Every dog will have his day. Including Kim Jong Un’s hunting dogs who got to eat his Uncle and his top aides who were all convicted of attempting to overthrow the Kim’s dictatorship in North Korea. They were also charged with being mean to women, as an homage to the few feminists in the country who survived their latest rounds of torture. According to a Hong Kong newspaper, Kim Jong Un watched on as his ravenous dogs ate his Uncle and Uncle’s cronies down to and through the bone. He then shared a large Domino’s half an half with Dennis Rodman while the two watched LOL kittens on YouTube. It’s kind of sick to order such a killing, but I have to admit, once ordered, I’d probably watch it too. Not something you see everyday in North Korea. It’s usually ravenous people eating the dogs.
With everyone from George Stephanopoulos to David Stern shitting on him, NBA legend Dennis Rodman retreated to his natural element of HPV and Whitesnake songs at a strip club when he returned from North Korea. The Worm has tried to tell people that North Korean dictator and half-man/half-potato Kim Jong Un is a good guy, but that all went to shit this week when Un’s lackeys threatened to nuke Washington.
“Now that the U.S. is set to light a fuse for a nuclear war, the revolutionary armed forces of the DPRK will exercise the right to a pre-emptive nuclear attack to destroy the strongholds of the aggressors and to defend the supreme interests of the country,” the North’s foreign ministry spokesman said in a statement carried by the official KCNA news agency. “The U.S. is massively deploying armed forces for aggression, including nuclear carrier task force and strategic bombers, enough to fight a nuclear war under the smokescreen of ‘annual drills’.” (NBC)
The last time North Korea attempted to fire a rocket, it flew about as far as a whistler stuck between your older brother’s butt cheeks. Needless to say, nobody in DC is scared. That’s why it’s great that the people at Official Comedy made this NBA Hangtime video game parody of Kim Jong Un and Rodman.
Hell, even China is laughing at North Korea right now, and that’s like Ike Turner laughing at Chris Brown.