The quality of human being Kim Kardashian is happens to be about as generic as those computer generated comments coming from fake follower Instagram accounts. She’s more fraudulent than her stepfather’s current gender status as female. The only things... READ MORE

If you’re not a celebrity and also scum, you’ve probably dined and dashed before. Excusing yourself to utilize the nearest lavatory only to escape to your car and disappear quicker than Kanye’s career after suggesting slavery was an opt-in... READ MORE

As a sign of improved U.S. Cuban relationships, we sent the Kardashians into Havana. Fuck you for being a pain in the ass for sixty years, Cuba. The Kardashians paraded through the streets in a Papal like motorcade blaring a... READ MORE

Somebody at Glamour had the bright idea of trying to make Kim Kardashian look thoughtful. Close your eyes for a moment and think of adjectives that describe Kim Kardashian. Let me know when you get to ‘thoughtful’. I just... READ MORE

Detectives don’t believe in coincidences. I’d hate to live in their cynical world. I happen to believe that Kim Kardashian winning the British GQ Woman of the Year award has nothing to do with her agreeing to take off... READ MORE

Unholy stable thing Kim Kardashian has signed a deal to release a coffee table book of her selfies. The book will feature 322 pictures that this particularly vain trollop took of herself over the last couple of years. I’d... READ MORE

Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton reconciled in a bar in Ibiza after years of hating on each other. Nobody actually remembers why the two nitwits fell out in the first place, but as with any whore fight, it probably... READ MORE

Who is the biggest feminist icon of the 21st century? Why, Kim Kardashian, of course. She’s like Mary Tyler Moore if Mary Tyler Moore had fucked everybody at WJM to get a promotion. She really does turn her world... READ MORE

Remember when Elvis got married and all the girls sobbed and weeped and defenestrated themselves because they could no longer have their fantasy lover? Yeah, I don’t remember that either. But I’m told it happened. Those were inconsistently innocent... READ MORE

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