Kim Kardashian did not get a haircut

By brendon May 14, 2012 @ 12:32 PM

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Despite how convincing it looked, Kim Kardashian did not get a haircut and was actually just wearing a wig during a photo shoot in LA yesterday for the Italian edition of Vogue. People says she looks almost exactly like her mom here, which is much nicer than saying she looks like a popular middle-aged prostitute, which is what I was planning.

(image source = fame/flynet)

why even pretend, Kanye?

By brendon May 14, 2012 @ 9:44 AM

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Some girls might be upset if there were pictures of their date pretending to listen to their dumb conversation but actually staring at their tits, but luckily for Kanye he dates Kim Kardashian, and any Hollywood starlet whose IMDb page includes a movie where she sucked off Ray-J five times is gonna be pretty tough to offend.

(image source of kanye and kim at staples saturday night to watch the lakers close out the nuggets in the first round of the nba playoffs = splash)

Kanye raps about marrying Kim Kardashian

By brendon May 10, 2012 @ 3:29 PM

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It’s easy, and fun, to make fun of Kanye West, but considering he got A’s in high school and his mom was the Chair of the English Department at Chicago State University, no one could actually consider him stupid.

Unless he really is thinking about marrying Kim Kardashian like Us magazine claims, in which case people could and should.

On an upcoming track by hip-hop artist Pusha T, West, 34, raps, “I saw you in the club in a white dress/Now I want to put you in a white dress.”
(Says) a second source: “Kim and Kanye are 100 percent having conversations about marriage … (he pursued her) for a long time.”

This already makes no sense, but that Kanye seems ready to rush into it is nothing short of insanity. I know he’s religious but God knocked up Mary and didn’t even take her on a date, so He’s hardly in a position to lecture us.

Kim Kardashian was banned from the Met Gala

By brendon May 09, 2012 @ 11:00 AM

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The Metropolitan Museum of Art Gala might be the biggest social event of the year in New York, second only to the Academy Awards when it comes to attracting big name celebrities. And since Kanye West and Kim Kardashian have been inseparable lately, there had to be a good reason why he was there without her.

And it turns out there was; it’s because Anna Wintour (editor of Vogue, the Meryl Streep character in ‘The Devil Wears Prada’, my new hero) banned her.

“Kim and her camp will deny that she wasn’t invited by saying that she had business in LA, but that is a lie. She would [have] done anything to be there with all the A-listers.”
“Anna hates Kim. Why would she be invited to the event? It is all the biggest stars in the world and Kim doesn’t fit that bill at all.”

Hahaha, you suck Kim Kardashian. Of course I’d feel differently if the party were at a natural history museum, because if movies have taught me anything, it’s that mummies come to life and start killing everyone whenever there’s a real fancy party in a natural history museum, and Kim Kardashian doesn’t look very hard to catch.

Kanye and Kim Kardashian are “talking marriage”

By brendon May 02, 2012 @ 5:09 PM

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According to a source (it’s Kim Kardashian), Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are so amazing together they’re already talking about getting married. So forget all that negative stuff you’ve heard about Kim for the last 6 months because that’s all in the past and we should ignore that other marriage because that’s old news and the new news is that Kim is totally marriage material and successful, popular people with lots of money want to be her husband. So if you could believe all that from now on, that would be great.

Just one month after going public with their romance, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are “very serious,” a source tells the new Us.com“>Us Weekly — as in, ready to pick out rings.
Although the reality star, 31, has yet to finalize her divorce from NBA star Kris Humphries, she and the rapper, 34, “are talking marriage,” says the source.

Wow. Kim Kardashian must not think very much of us if we’re expected to believe this asinine story. There might as well have been a part about how Kris Humphries can’t get an erection.

Kim Kardashian forgot this Ferrari was a wedding gift

By brendon May 01, 2012 @ 8:22 PM

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On Friday it was reported that Kim Kardashian “forgot” one of the wedding presents she received for her sham 72-day marriage, because instead of giving them back or splitting them with her husband, she’s keeping them all for herself and giving $200,000 to charity, an amount she says is twice what the gifts are worth.

Well now it turns out the gift she didn’t count is a $325,000 Ferrari (a 458 Italia?) and it’s odd that it slipped her mind considering she drives it. Radar says:

However, Kris (Humphries) hasn’t forgotten, and although he has no intention of asking for the car his attorneys do intend to question Kardashian under oath as to why she didn’t include the value of the expensive sports car when she tallied up the cost of their wedding gifts.

ATTORNEY: “Why didn’t you include the value of the Ferrari when adding up the cost of the wedding gifts and giving ‘twice the amount’ to charity?”
KIM KARDASHIAN: “Because I’m a vapid, selfish bitch.”
ATTORNEY: “Oh. Oh ok. I kinda thought you’d dance around it for a while. Nothing further, I guess.”

(image source = splash)