Miley Cyrus Topless On Facetime

Miley Cyrus is overachieving. Like Rudy, if everybody agreed they would fuck Rudy if nobody else would ever find out. She can't sing, but she's a multi-platinum recording artist. She's not sexy, but she's become the go-to girl on sexuality. Her tits wouldn't make first... read more

Kim Kardashian Still Naked, Finally Punished

Kim Kardashian has been shilling some morning sickness pill in her vapid social media posts, leading the Food and Drug Administration to step in and tell her to stop doing it and also you're spreading a new strain of syphilis to ISIS. It's called the Geneva Convention.... read more

Kim Kardashian Pregnant, Naked, Alone

Kim Kardashian responded to imaginary critics of her pregnant body by posting naked photos of herself. It's reflexive. The last time her mechanic told her she needed an oil change, she fucked seven guys at three different Jiffy Lubes. Jaime King cried and threatened to... read more

Kim Kardashian Bursting With Pride

Kim Kardashian is pregnant with another person whose life expectancy is 37. You can only be a shitty moron once removed. Plus they're developing new pills. Apparently when you get pregnant your tits get really big and swollen which in no way compensates for your... read more

Kylie Jenner Graduation Party Hosted By Ryan Seacrest

Ryan Seacrest hosted a high school graduation party for Kylie Jennerwhere he pretended heliked girlsand Kylie pretended Laurel Springs is a real place. Laurel Springs High School diplomasare the Hollywood equivalent of becoming a Universal Life Church minister so you can... read more

Kim Kardashian Morning Rituals

Kim Kardashian crawling out of a ditch is a reminder of just how poor serial killers have become at finishing off their truck stop prey. Nobody takes pride in their work anymore. It's possible the scent of money brought her back from the great whore beyond. It's like... read more

Kim Kardashian Smothered Music To Death In Its Crib

Sinead O'Connor has declared Kim Kardashian's tits on the cover of Rolling Stone magazines as an official end to music as we know it. in the very least, O'Connorseems to have missed Rolling Stone covers of the Boston Marathon bomber looking like a sexy James Dean and... read more

Kim Kardashian Thrown On Trash Heap

Kim Kardashian did a photo shoot for some Euro trash website looking like a dead hooker who just got dumped out of the trunk of a Buick. It appears she has gone from having a fat ass to having a fat ass. Like she's overweight. We're talking 4'8" 170. Her incredibly not... read more

Kardashian Sisters Form a Sexually Up For Anything Megazord

The Kardashian sisters stick together through their first three marriages and first five abortions. It's liturgyrepeated since their tween days deadlifting kettle-bells with their sphincter muscles in the family dojo. Seeing the fatinjectedsisters in tight white was like... read more

Kim Kardashian's Master Class And Shit Around The Web

Toiletry bag itemKim Kardashian gave her lecture on the objectification of women and other topics thereby being further legitimized. She talked about what it was like to be used as spank material and what the best lighting is for a selfie. She also says that she didn't... read more

Kim Kardashian Prepares to Breast Feed London

Seeing Kim Kardashian play London with her pregnancy boobs reminds us that hookers don't get maternity leave. I'm sure SCOTUS is on that. If Kim's tits disappear from public view for more than twenty-four hours, she ceases to be a real girl and goes back to being a wood... read more

Kim Kardashian Ted Talks

NPR listeners were outraged when Kim Kardashian was invited on the station to speak intelligently, causing NPR listeners to not be able to casually mention that brilliantthing they heard this morning on NPR to their friends, rendering the entire listening process moot.... read more