Kim Kardashian Flowerless

Kim Kardashian made a phone call to her straight husband Kanye West on her TV show which will not be on the air until 2037. She announced there is something wrong with the reproductive segments of her businessand it might prohibit her from having more children: "I'm trying to get a hold of Kanye cause I just came from my fertility doctor and they need me to go into surgery to kind of clear out something in my uterus."...

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Jaime King Seems Acutely Sensitive

Jaime King claims that witnessingKim Kardashian bashed online for being huge and pregnant at the Met Ball two years ago made her cry for five hours. That seems like an awful long time. Especially when learning about The Holocaust in school only elicited a mild grimace. It was so stunning to me that people thought that that was okay -- not only okay but they condoned it.They would not even think about the way it would...

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Rob Kardashian Deconstructed

The Kardashian whoremachine is floating a few trial balloons as reasons why Rob Kardashian referred to his sister Kim on Twitter as a lying manipulative murderous bitch. According to sources that are almost certainly Kris Jenner's media team, Rob Kardashian is just a silly prankster who loves practical jokes. Funny gags like eating disorders, depression, ditching his sister's wedding, punching women, and cutting sock...

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Rob Kardashian On the Run And Shit Around The Web

Rob Kardashian called his sister Kim out for being a sociopathic murderer. Either he's right or he's wrong. Either way, he's dead. Read all about Rob getting Gone Girled. (TMZ) Start your week off right, with girls with giant boobs. (The Chive) Summer St. Claire shows her topless bug yums in the great outdoors. (Egotastic) Megan Fox models in a sheer bodysuit for a Korean skincare line. (Drunken Stepfather) Lauren...

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Rob Kardashian In A Twist

Rob Kardashian posted a photo of the evil manipulative chick from Gone Girl along with the caption "This is my sister Kim, the bitch from Gone Girl." Curiously, Rob's Instagram page consists solely of this photo because he eitherhas body dysmorphia or nobody likes him enough to take pictures. After posting the photo Rob then unfollowed his entire family on Instagram like a motherfucking boss. I thought posting cryptic...

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North West Knows What's What (VIDEO)

The new $100 million deal with E! is done. Promo pieces used to bump the deal are no longer needed. Like North West. She's staging furniture for an open house. The home sells, that swank divans go back to the show room. North isn't even two and she knows her time has passed. She used to be cradled in fur. Now she's desperately hanging on to luggage so she's not left behind at LAX. Who's that bitch snaking a ride? Oh,...

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Kim Kardashian Seems Modest

Kim Kardashian showed her appreciation for the new fat contract from E! by nearly baring her breasts on the new Keeping Up with the Kardashians season. This as opposed to baring her breasts for half a dozen cheap magazines in the past few months and sailors in the port of Long Beach for $50 a peekaboo. I applaud the producers for trying to come up with something worth watching. Tits. Screaming. Revelations. And a pan...

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Kanye West Still Dresses His Bride

It's creepy that your husband lays out and approves your clothes at thirty-four, even if it does bring back childhood memories of hosting dad's client friends. It's International Women's Day. Time to lay out some ground rules. Rule one, stop dressing me like a fuck toy. Show off my tits and ass, fine. But I don't need to look like the mountain goat all the other goats hump because she's got her hoof caught in the...

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Kim Kardashian Has Sex 500 Times a Day (VIDEO)

Kim Kardashian's claim that she has sex with Kanye five hundred times a day seems exaggerated. It's probably closer to fifty and only some of that is Kanye. That's entire reason for the bakery Turn-O-Matic tickets at the entrance to Kim's fuck cave. Plausible deniability. Also to stop vehicles from ramming. Kim's revelation comes in the latest promo for her sister-whores program which officially surpasses the nine...

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Kim Kardashian Blond Seems 10 Percent Less Craven

In France to discuss the social repercussions from trans-African Muslim population resettlement, Kardashian went platinum blond so she could have but five minutes break from people referring to her as that brunette whore who queefs ingots. She looks particularly emotional. Like the dude who made Chappie feel real feelings kicked her in the cooey with some activation dust. She just seems so real now. It's almost eerie....

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Kim Kardashian Making More Apps

Kim Kardashian is on the cover of AdWeek. Probably not related to AdWeek naming her whoring and shoppingmobile game for tweens the hottest app of the year. Major media is more incestuous than the Duggars. You know dad is creating those new grandkids. The article allows Kim to pretend she played some important design role in her current game and the next twenty-seven games she'll release because young girls are stupid...

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Kanye Grieves Like No Other

Sometimes you peel back the layers on a guy you just assumed was an asshole and you're able to confirm your suspicions. I'd recommend this for days when there's nothing good on TV. Kanye West broke down in tears on BBC radio talking about the recent death of his fashion mentor, Louise Wilson, a professor at a London Art School who Kanye once looked up on Wikipedia: Louise Wilson was the baddest professor of all time...

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Kardashians Crashing More Vehicles

Every time you accidentally catch a glimpse of TMZ they're reporting on a member of this family crashing a vehicle. Given this group ispatently uninteresting and in desperate need of material I think it's fair to posit they're doing it on purposelike when a dog shits on the floor for attention.Kim, Khloe, Kylie were in Montana where they were supposedly skiing but were probably filming boringtelevision on skis and...

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Kim Kardashian Super Cleavy While Heading To SNL 40th Anniversary

Photo Credit: Splash [gallery id="2384"]

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Yeezy's Pedophile Booty Dreams Come to Life

I don't know what the fuck Kanye was selling last night. I think it was blank faced children in nude bodysuits. A horde of stolen Ukrainian teen sex slaves came marching out in suede booties to the sound of Kanye West's voice booming on about engineering greatness once more. I don't know. I feel like pedophilia has been around for a while. As have Northern Jersey hooker boots. Adidas got involved in this mess because...

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