Kim Kardashian Seems Modest

Kim Kardashian showed her appreciation for the new fat contract from E! by nearly baring her breasts on the new Keeping Up with the Kardashians season. This as opposed to baring her breasts for half a dozen cheap magazines in the past few months and sailors in the port of Long Beach for $50 a peekaboo. I applaud the producers for trying to come up with something worth watching. Tits. Screaming. Revelations. And a pan...read more

Kanye West Still Dresses His Bride

It's creepy that your husband lays out and approves your clothes at thirty-four, even if it does bring back childhood memories of hosting dad's client friends. It's International Women's Day. Time to lay out some ground rules. Rule one, stop dressing me like a fuck toy. Show off my tits and ass, fine. But I don't need to look like the mountain goat all the other goats hump because she's got her hoof caught in the...read more

Kim Kardashian Has Sex 500 Times a Day (VIDEO)

Kim Kardashian's claim that she has sex with Kanye five hundred times a day seems exaggerated. It's probably closer to fifty and only some of that is Kanye. That's entire reason for the bakery Turn-O-Matic tickets at the entrance to Kim's fuck cave. Plausible deniability. Also to stop vehicles from ramming. Kim's revelation comes in the latest promo for her sister-whores program which officially surpasses the nine...read more

Kim Kardashian Blond Seems 10 Percent Less Craven

In France to discuss the social repercussions from trans-African Muslim population resettlement, Kardashian went platinum blond so she could have but five minutes break from people referring to her as that brunette whore who queefs ingots. She looks particularly emotional. Like the dude who made Chappie feel real feelings kicked her in the cooey with some activation dust. She just seems so real now. It's almost eerie....read more

Kim Kardashian Making More Apps

Kim Kardashian is on the cover of AdWeek. Probably not related to AdWeek naming her whoring and shoppingmobile game for tweens the hottest app of the year. Major media is more incestuous than the Duggars. You know dad is creating those new grandkids. The article allows Kim to pretend she played some important design role in her current game and the next twenty-seven games she'll release because young girls are stupid...read more

Kanye Grieves Like No Other

Sometimes you peel back the layers on a guy you just assumed was an asshole and you're able to confirm your suspicions. I'd recommend this for days when there's nothing good on TV. Kanye West broke down in tears on BBC radio talking about the recent death of his fashion mentor, Louise Wilson, a professor at a London Art School who Kanye once looked up on Wikipedia: Louise Wilson was the baddest professor of all time...read more

Kardashians Crashing More Vehicles

Every time you accidentally catch a glimpse of TMZ they're reporting on a member of this family crashing a vehicle. Given this group ispatently uninteresting and in desperate need of material I think it's fair to posit they're doing it on purposelike when a dog shits on the floor for attention.Kim, Khloe, Kylie were in Montana where they were supposedly skiing but were probably filming boringtelevision on skis and...read more

Yeezy's Pedophile Booty Dreams Come to Life

I don't know what the fuck Kanye was selling last night. I think it was blank faced children in nude bodysuits. A horde of stolen Ukrainian teen sex slaves came marching out in suede booties to the sound of Kanye West's voice booming on about engineering greatness once more. I don't know. I feel like pedophilia has been around for a while. As have Northern Jersey hooker boots. Adidas got involved in this mess because...read more

Baby North Got Her First Fur

People who love animals a whole lot are mortified that Kim Kardashian purchased fur for her gentle bastard daughter. I believe that's badger. Protestors fail to understand Kim's plan to shuffle North out into the woods to live an existence away from cameras and spotlights and magazine interviews where mom says she loves to take big cocks from behind. The fur will help North blend until such time as she can construct...read more

Kim Kardashian Opens Wide

Kim Kardashian's tits are the window to her soul. The porn star opened her sanctuary of deep thoughts for an interview conducted by Cara Delevingne. Should you ever be interviewed by a rich British chick who's finger banging your half-sister, forget the pretense. She already knows. The buxom brunette admitted that her favorite sexual position is "from the back" and that there's no such thing as being "too big."...read more

Cara Delevingne Working Kendall and Kylie

This savvy vagina hunter is barely lifting a finger these days. Her snatch is aerosolizing scents programmed to intoxicate illiterate young women within a thirty click radius. Her kill list reads like the VIP rolls inside the Hollywood Red Tent. It must be some kind of bet she has going. Nobody loves high maintenance pussy this much. Photo Credit: Solve Sundsbo for Love Magazineread more

Kim Kardashian Nude in the Crease

Will I be forced to give Kim Kardashian credit for appearing creviced and pucker skinned naked in Love Magazine? Fuck, she's not even wearing eyebrows. This is like POV German porn. Did they take her tits and put them on her younger sister in those earlier pictures? Was that some fucked up social statement about the objectification of women's bodies? Which ones will the McDonald's workers be tributing in the prep...read more

Kendall Jenner Topless With Somebody Else's Tits

I thought the Supreme Court or the Justice League or Alyssa Milano's mom made it illegal to put fake bare tits on the faces of famous people. Maybe the law states that if you get paid in fat dollars the commandos can't bust in through the windows and confiscate the printing presses. I'm not sure who green-lit this abomination. You had the world's most famous porn family on the clock for eight hours and you went and...read more

Kim Kardashian Not Done

Kim Kardashian is showing her bare tits and ass in another magazine and McDonald's still carries the quarter pounder.The photos were leaked on Twitter by someone instructed to do so as a member of Kim's entourage paid in followers. The issue of Love magazine isguest edited by Cara Delevingne which means she's able to point and answer questions by blinking. Shealso interviews Kim if you want toreadit while doing your...read more