Kim Kardashian Dissecting Kanye

You can't turn out a good man. A confused man, far easier. The Kardashians choose male partners of notoriety and means, not of masculine character. Inherently, any man who signs up to be run by a bubble-butted midget is a gender fail. read more

Kardashian Reasons to Pen in Ocean's Eight

Hollywood's put women and Leslie Mann's gimp in charge of empowering women in film. Mostly they've come up with taking previously successful film franchises and rebooting them with female casts in the place of the original male cast. You give ideating a bad name, and that... read more

Kim Kardashian Kills It in Dubai (VIDEO)

This is ultimately how the world comes together. Kim Kardashian receiving a standing ovation from thousands of women in hijabs who paid a small fortune to see her get made-up on stage in Dubai. read more

Advertisement
The French Nab Kardashian Robbery Fiends

Leave it to the French to get the important shit right. Non-enforceable climate change accords, not allowing girls to be prostitutes until sixteen, and amassing never before seen levels of law enforcement resources to clear their good name in the Kim Kardashian jewelry... read more

Kim Kardashian Brings Infection

Kim Kardshian's makeup artist Joyce Bonelli entertained a visit from Kim Kardashian who promptly kissed Bonelli's newborn twins on the face. WebMD highly encourages moms to keep strangers from kissing their infants in or around their face or hands. read more

Kim Kardashian's Make Up Artist Twin Feeds from Her Implants

If breastfeeding your baby is the new Joan of Arc level of heroism, then nursing twins from lactating glands above your silicone breasts implants is something akin to Mother Theresa, if she also wore low cut tops and caught by-product semen splash from her boss' male... read more

Kim Kardashian Stiffs Jesus (VIDEO)

This Love Advent calendar production program isn't that complicated. You pick a kitschy song and dance around in your panties with your tits on the edge of falling out of your bra. Somehow Kim Kardashian fucked hers up. read more

Kardashians Rise Above

When tragedy inevitably strikes their menfolk, the Kardashian women rise to the occasion by moving on with work and doctoring legal letters to financially benefit from the underlying trauma. read more

The Kanye Thing Starting To Make Sense

Contrary to popular belief, you can be mentally ill and a huge asshole. Meaning, you don't get to walk around acting like a major cunt and blame it on your illness. Some schizophrenics think the clouds are cartoons. Others stab strangers in the subway station. Those ones... read more

Advertisement
Kim Kardashian On 60 Minutes and Stage Parents Hustling Their Kids on The Last Men on Earth Podcast #65

On this week's Last Men on Earth podcast we delve into the racial bias suit genius of Byron Allen, wonder why Hillary supporters won't concede they only like her because she's a woman, discuss how men should behave at costume parties, wonder if perhaps Subway Jared's wife... read more

Never Go Against the Family

MediaTakeOut made its bones by publishing many of the early hacked celebrity email and text nudes before Scarlett Johansson and Jennifer Lawrence muscled the FBI into the equation and made re-posting that shit plain suicidal. The Feds are one thing. The Kardashian legal... read more

Outrage Over Updated Kim Kardashian Halloween Costume

Internet outrage, as infinite as the stars in the universe, has turned its attention on an online costume company that every year puts out a controversial title of two to garner simplistic media attention. Fuck, guilty. read more