I can imagine married life with Kurt Cobain was pretty fucking dismal. Less Sleepless in Seattle and microwave popcorn and more catatonic Kurt staring at a dead bird on his window sill and shitting in his pants. Genius artist and all that bullshit that comes with being a self-medicated moping wet blanket. At some point before Kurt decided it was time to shotgun shuffle of his mortal coil, he took time to put a handwritten note in his wallet about his equally horrific life partner, Courtney Love.
Do you Kurt Cobain take Courtney Michelle Love to be your lawful shredded wife, even when she’s a bitch with zits and siphoning all yr money for doping and whoring…
I can abide progressive wedding vows about working together to keep Mother Earth pristine, or those where Cleveland Browns fans make jokes about suffering together through more football seasons, but this seems a bit of a downer. Some are speculating that this note was a dark joke between Kurt and Courtney. These are people who’ve obviously never had a serious girlfriend before. I don’t care how macabre she is, she won’t giggle when she finds a note in your wallet calling her a gold digging dope fiend whore. You know, especially when she happens to be a gold digging dope fiend whore. In the end, Kurt referred to Courtney a ‘goddess’ in his suicide note. He was probably super crazy fucking high when he wrote both, so who’s to say which represented his true feelings about Courtney Love. Well, the gun in the mouth might provide some insight.
Lana Del Rey did a cover of Nirvana’s ‘Heart Shaped Box’ during a concert in Sydney last week, and though it’s down now, Courtney Love–pardon me–Courtney Love Cobain, went on twitter today to smugly ask if Lana even knows what the song is about. And then explained it was about her vagina. The phrase ‘heart shaped box’ refers to a ladies vagina. Who would have guessed.
After that she said Kevin Spacey is Keyser Söze and Bruce Willis is a ghost. The theme was: things drunk heroin addicts find amazing but everyone else figured out 15 years ago.
Frances Bean Cobain, the 19-year-old daughter of Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain, described her mom as unstable and an unrepentant drug addict in court papers filed to get a restraining order in 2009.
I know, right! I was surprised too!
“(Love) has taken drugs for as long as I can remember,” Cobain said. “She basically exists on Xanax, Adderall, Sonata and Abilify, sugar and cigarettes. She rarely eats … She often falls asleep in her bed while she is smoking, and I am constantly worried that she will start a fire (which she has done at least three times) that will threaten our lives.”
And the restraining order wasn’t just for Frances; it also applied to her pets, because “Love’s wreckless behavior caused the death the family dog and cat.”
“The cat died after getting entangled in Love’s messy piles of ‘Etsy fabrics, boxes of paperwork, trash and other possessions,’ (and) the dog swallowed several of Love’s stash of prescription pills.”
Yes. That’s exactly how I pictured life for a child being raised by Courtney Love. Frances would have been better off living in that cave at the beginning of ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’.
This video of Miley Cyrus and her nasally voice doing a cover of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” during a concert in Ecuador last week could be worse, but only if that girl from the Ring crawled out of your screen and started stabbing you.