On one hand, pairing Lacey Schwimmer, who has seemingly quadrupled in size since last year, with Chaz Bono, who has not quadrupled in size since last year but was this fat to begin with, on the new season of Dancing With The Stars has disaster written all over it because there is no possible chance they could ever win a show about sexy dancing.
On the other hand, putting them together concentrates the ugly fatties within one couple instead of splitting them up and dragging down two couples. So really they should probably do this kind of thing every season.
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I’ve never heard of Lacey Schwimmer, but she was playing basketball in a bikini top with Romeo before rehearsals for Dancing With the Stars in West Hollywood yesterday, so I assume she’s one of the pro dancers. I also assume he’s banging her because he’s black and she’s a thick white girl. I didn’t do an ounce of research for this one in case you couldn’t tell. But after that some stuff happened, and then Kirstie Alley ordered a pizza with ham, pepperoni, bacon, and cinnamon rolls with double icing as toppings.
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BRITNEY SPEARS - and her agent/boyfriend took to the pool this weekend outside her house in LA. She’s taken her hair from blond to brown, while he went from brown to blond. Just imagine all the fascinating conversations these geniuses had about that. (metro)
MICHAEL JACKSON - it’s believed that 12 fans have now committed or attempted suicide since Jackson died on Thursday. This man was barely saved in time:
“He was in a terrible state and kept on saying: ‘It’s all the same to me. I’m going to kill myself. It’s the worst tragedy of my life and I don’t want to live any more. I don’t know why you saved my life, I want to be with him’.”
A report from Tunisia claims a girl took her life as well but that has yet to be verified. Why would they do this? Obviously it’s because their lives are fantastic. (the sun, e!)
LACEY SCWIMMER - I’m told that Lacey Scwimmer is on “Dancing With The Stars”, though I have no idea what that might mean. All I know for sure is that she turned 21 this weekend, and that if these were any more boring the images would have refused to stick to the film.
