By Lex December 02, 2015 @ 12:05 PM
In a more efficient world, the entirety of marketing departments would be replaced by one chunky dude in sandals who says, how about naked girls? It would suck for people who graduated with dubious majors into jobs with dubious achievement standards, but McDonald’s pays fifteen an hour now and Hillary Clinton is willing to erase the college debt of any chick who signs a pledge not to fuck her husband. These three models cost a fortune to get naked. I’m assuming there’s a bump for skin on skin on skin contact. All to sell shoes. It’s fucking genius. Will these $300 platform open toes make me look like that? I don’t know, is your credit card working?
Photo Credit: Stuart Weitzman
By Lex January 26, 2015 @ 1:28 PM
People who say the commercials are the best part about the Super Bowl have never seen Katy Perry sing over a pre-recorded track to staged multicultural fans screaming their heads off. Until they allow tits on network television, the game itself will always be better. You can’t beat football with not football and not tits. Victoria’s Secret is going to try with a lingerie ad. It’ll tempt millions of men to buy lingerie for their ladies on Valentine’s Day because they’re either dating Adriana Lima or they’re stupid. Why not just buy her a fungo bat and tell her to rupture your ball sac. Leave looking good in underwear to the professionals. Everybody else just looks modestly okay on down to ‘I wouldn’t have done that’. The next time your lady says she buys lingerie to look good for herself, mumble, you’re telling me. But mumble it really softly or out comes the fucking fungo.
Photo Credit: Victoria’s Secret
By Lex November 13, 2014 @ 10:05 AM
Photo Credit: Esquire Mexico
By Lex October 21, 2014 @ 10:39 AM
As much as it will cost a small Asian village a week of textile wages, a few child starvations are the price of seeing a bunch of Victoria’s Secret models without their lingerie. Underwear is but a contrivance of a polite society. An artificial waste of time that I would insist only apply to the male population were I the handsomest President ever. Jesus weeps when nice tits are covered. I’m pretty sure that’s from Gospels.
These photos are from the Angels book by Russell James which features a bunch of the Victoria’s Secret models topless as well as Kendall Jenner rolled up in a naked ball just because that’s a good way to sell copies. Fuck, that’s a good way to sell anything. Yes, that is Kendall Jenner rolled up naked in the back of my ’97 Subaru Outback just like I wrote in my Craigslist ad. Now, how about you write me a fat $700 check and take them both.
Photo Credit: Russell James
By Lex September 11, 2014 @ 10:14 AM
Russell James is one of those rare dudes fortunate enough to earn a living by photographing naked models. He’s sort of like Terry Richardson except he knows how to use a camera and you won’t flee his studio with the imprint of his cock on your cheek. James’ new book ‘Angels’ features a bunch of topless Victoria’s Secret Angels for those sophisticates who like to feature naked lingerie models on their coffee table. Even though she’s not a Victoria’s Secret model and she’s not showing off her tits, Kendall Jenner was included in the Angels book. It’s sort of like running a reprint of the King James Bible with the previously unpublished Book of Barely Legal. She doesn’t belong, but she moves copies.
Photo Credit: Russell James Photographer
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By Lex June 03, 2014 @ 11:08 AM
Photo Credit: Glamour Paris