Lily Allen Danced Topless To Drake (VIDEO)

By Travis May 28, 2014 @ 9:00 AM

Lily Allen seems like a lot of fun sometimes

Lily Allen is a tough one to figure out, because there are times that she comes off annoying and strange and there are other times that she’s funny and sexy. This Instagram video from yesterday is a perfect example, because she’s dancing and shaking her hips in nothing but a pair of Spanx and an arm bra, which is great because topless girls are one of the world’s most important treasures. But then she’s also singing along with a Drake song and using a dumb voice, and that’s disappointing because it takes away from the joy of hoping that she’s going to move her arm. I guess what I’m trying to say is we’re not thankful enough for the mute button.

Read more >

Stop It Lily Allen, You’re Getting Us All Hot

By Travis May 09, 2014 @ 2:00 PM

Lily Allen was in the hospital or something 1

Singer Lily Allen had a little scare yesterday, as she was reportedly “rushed to the hospital” after she cut an interview short because of “projectile vomiting.” Sure, it sounds pretty serious on the surface, what with the public concerns of demonic possessions being at an all-time high, but Lily assured her fans that she was fine by posting a photo of herself looking like a corpse on Instagram. “I’m fine though guys,” she wrote, possibly while typing with small streams of puke hitting each individual key, “Just need some fluids cause I can’t keep anything down.” And somewhere, someone who really gets off on gross hospital photos of pasty white girls replied, “I’ve got some fluids for you.”

Lily Allen Knows How To Raise Money For Kids

By Travis April 02, 2014 @ 10:00 AM

Lily Allen was one of the performers at last night’s celebration of the 275th anniversary of Coram, the oldest children’s charity in the world. Naturally, the only way to celebrate raising money to help kids is by wearing a flesh-toned top with no bra so it looks like your breasts are on full display. I’m not knocking it, of course, because there’s no better strategy in making old white men give out free money than by having naked women dance for it. They could just make a fun game out of it next time, and maybe have a more voluptuous singer like Katy Perry slowly remove her clothes as she performs, while the rich people throw money at her. Then, all of the really sick and dying kids could go out on stage and race each other in picking all the money up. However much they can hold is what goes toward saving their lives. Charity really doesn’t need to be so boring and proper all the time.

Photo Credits: Getty

Emma Rigby is in a bikini, tangled web of intrigue

By brendon January 16, 2013 @ 11:05 AM

emma_rigby_bikini

English actress Emma Rigby is in Miami today filming a movie called ‘Plastic’, and, FUN FACT, Emma is married to Alfie Allen from ‘Game of Thrones’ (this guy), who is Lily Allens little brother. So, if you know her song “Alfie“, where she’s worried that her little brother will never get laid because all he does is sit in his room all day smoking weed and playing XBox, yes, it’s about him. Theon Greyjoy.

SECOND FUN FACT: I used to know a girl in high school named Emma, and she had a blue bikini too. I wonder if she’s related to this Emma Rigby girl.

(image source = fame/flynet)

I Heart Lily Allen, part 30

By brendon May 04, 2012 @ 12:23 PM

lily_allen_the_box_london

Some people will no doubt get all sanctimonious today and criticize Lily Allen for going to The Box in London last night and then stumbling out at 4am, presumably drunk, but here’s an interesting counterpoint; fuck those people. Lily Allen is awesome. I love Lily Allen. I love ‘the Fear‘, I love that she would do a cover of something as goofy as ‘Womanizer‘, I love that she runs around topless, I love that she does anal, I love that she’s been calling Madonna irrelevant for at least 6 years, and I love that she was one of the only ones to tell Perez Hilton to fuck off back when most famous people were scared of that Frankenstein-headed jackass.

And who knows, maybe she didn’t get drunk. Maybe she was drugged. Maybe someone shot her with one of those darts like in movies. Were you at the Box last at 4am? Well then you don’t really know what happened, now do you!

(image source = fame/flynet)

Monday headlines, with pregnant bride Lily Allen

By brendon June 13, 2011 @ 1:56 PM

1736002

KIM KARDASHIAN – was accused of cheating on her fiance after an NFL player named Brett Lockett told InTouch they’d been having a “physical relationship” for 5 months, but now he admits he’s never actually met her face to face. His dick must be huge. (e!)

SUPER 8 – was number 1 at the box office with $37M, because movie theaters don’t give refunds. (ew)

BOOK OF MORMON – is the musical written by Matt Stone and Trey Parker of ‘South Park’ (amazon has the cast recording on sale for $1.99), and last night it won 9 of the 14 Tony awards it was nominated for, including Best Musical and Best Director for Parker. The other “director” nominees told the actors to face the back wall and just wing it. It was foolish direction in hindsight. (people)

LILY ALLEN – got married this weekend, then announced that she’s 4 months pregnant, then took wedding pictures in a graveyard, yet still got upstaged by her older sister Sarah Owen, who wore this slutty dress. At least according to me. I love sluts! (sun, splash, wenn)