Lisa Opie in a Bikini

By Lex July 02, 2015 @ 8:31 AM

Lisa Opie Bikini Booty In Miami
Fat women will point out how skinny women are just as likely to die in a thermonuclear explosion as they are. It’s probably not to your benefit to skip meals to fit perfectly into your little bikini. But that’s you. Let’s talk about me. I appreciate it. There’ll be time for Arby’s when you’re older and your attorneys have quashed your first prenup. Fuck early, often, and skinny, and you won’t need to be part of the body shape debate women invented to feel the tingle of self-hatred. Men who appreciate full-figured women earn 32-cents on the dollar to men who like women who starve themselves to look pretty. I’m not buying your commitment to bulimia. Back away from the scone.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Lisa Opie In A White Bikini

By Lex January 30, 2015 @ 8:45 AM

Lisa Opie In A White Bikini In Miami
The obvious downside of being a chick who wears a bikini for her nine to five is the starvation and gym workouts you can’t fake. The upside, sleeping until 11:00 am and casually running a credit check on the guy in your bed who claims to be a successful night club owner. Will he be a winner or a dud? This is fantasy football for models in Miami.

Photo Credit: Splash

Lisa Opie in A Bikini Doing Yoga

By Lex November 04, 2014 @ 11:27 AM

Lisa Opie Wears A Bikini While Doing Yoga On The Beach In Miami
I’m not sure women should be allowed to strike this particular pose on the public beach. It’s like showing off breasts. It’s merely going to cause boys to become interested in girls and someday want to have sex with them. Somebody needs to explain to these boys that while sex is totally fucking awesome, until such time as they are either a Formula One race car driver or invested heavily in Western desert mining interests, they will not be having sex with models from the Virgin Islands who do yoga on the beach in Miami. Maybe the girl with the canker sores who stocks the OSH electrical aisles. We end up with a generation of disappointed men who crave foreign wars and ice cold 3.2 beer. Get your ass back to the seated position, woman. Vishnu might be pleased, but not so the Everglades Chapter of the Daughters of the American Revolution.

Photo Credit: Splash

Lisa Opie in a Bikini

By Lex October 01, 2014 @ 1:11 PM

Lisa Opie Wears A Bikini While Doing Yoga On The Beach
If you can’t pull off a decent upward bow, you can’t be my girlfriend. Fuck if I grimace when I try to touch my toes. If I can’t rest my chalupa party pack on your midsection for at least the first half of a Sunday NFC East showdown, I’m not going to meet your parents and pretend I have a real job. People who tell you successful relationships are based on love and affection might as well head straight from first date to contentious divorce. Relationships are based on give and take. What are you offering and what do I have to give you in return. I want a girl who can assume all the major porn positions. In return, she can drive my late model Toyota on the weekends. That’s how we’re going to make it fifty years, babe.

Photo Credit: Splash

Lisa Opie And Kristina Sofia Wear Bikinis Together On The Beach In Miami

By Lex September 24, 2014 @ 10:18 AM

Lisa Opie And Kristina Sofia Wear Bikinis Together On The Beach In Miami

Photo Credit: Splash

Lisa Opie Talks On The Phone In A Bikini On Miami Beach

By Lex September 02, 2014 @ 8:17 AM

Lisa Opie Talks On Phone In Bikini On Miami Beach

Photo Credit: Splash