Mark Cuban Is Pretty Shitty With the Advice

By Lex January 14, 2016 @ 10:30 AM


Mark Cuban has free advice for the Powerball winners that you could probably just as easily get on the back of a fortune cookie along with the numbers that won you the millions in the first place:

Don’t take the lump sum. You’re probably an addict of some kind so you’ll just blow through it and be broke again in two years.

Money can’t buy you happiness. Something said by people who aren’t eating free ketchup packs from fast food restaurants for meals.

The money will make you happier because you’ll never have to worry about bills again.
So, a complete contradiction of the previous point, but more honest.

Tell your friends and relative not to ask you for shit. Solid advice. Buy your dad a Caddy, buy your mom a nice new small house. NBA first guaranteed contract rules apply. Uncles and cousins get shit.

Don’t assume that winning the lottery makes you a savvy investor. There aren’t many business opportunities out there for your sweet skill of filling out numbered bubbles that represent your phone number.

This all seems like fantastic advice that absolutely nobody who won is going to follow. Your most common regular lottery player is one giant dumbass failure. The average $100,000 wage earner in this country spends $100 or less on the lottery every year. The average person below the poverty line spends $500. Noodle that and then consider handing today’s Powerball winners a broom at your store three years from now. It’s not about being charitable, it’s about laughing to yourself and feeling superior.

Photo credit: FameFlynet

Mark Cuban Is Almost Not a Hypocrite

By Lex May 22, 2014 @ 6:27 PM

Mark Cuban said that he’s feeling hesitant about voting to take away Donald Sterling’s franchise rights because he himself and probably everybody in the world is at least a little bit racist.

If I see a black kid in a hoodie at night on the same side of the street, I’m probably going to walk to the other side of the street.

Shit, not the old black kid in a hoodie thing that white people use as the least offensive concession of having racist thoughts. If I see a black kid with gang tattoos in a prison jump suit carrying a gun and yelling ‘come here, cracker, so I can pop you’, I will shift to the other side of the road. I am a racist! Still, it’s a point. Even though we don’t all have Mexican hookers to order to stop hanging out with black dudes in public, everybody is some innate level of hateful prejudiced bastard. So what business do the NBA owners have judging Donald Sterling so harshly as to take away his thirty-year long franchise just for telling his whores his color rules. Mark Cuban notes the hypocrisy in casting such a vote. Then he announced he will be voting for the punishment anyhow. It’s enough just to point out the right thing to do, you don’t actually have to do it. That can be a pain.

Photo credit: Splash News