melissa theuriau is not from here

By brendon March 01, 2009 @ 6:17 PM

French newscaster Mélissa Theuriau was in Miami with her monkeyman husband and his creepy arm this weekend.  She looks terrific considering she had a kid just three months ago.  I can’t even begin to guess how that dude is doing this.  I assume it has something to do with sorcery.  It seems obvious that his mind can shape the physical world and bend the wills of men.  How do you stop someone like this?  Guns don’t work.  The bullet would stop a foot in front of him and then turn around and hit the person with the gun.  Oh God damn we are so screwed.

(image source = mavrix online)

this is so uncomfortable

By brendon March 01, 2009 @ 5:48 PM

These pictures of Melissa Theuriau and MonkeyMan are creepy.  He's like a little pygmy.  Or retard.  It looks like a sexual assault.  Like she's one of those crazy nurses who molest retarded patients.  She would bring him apple slices and then lick his neck when they were alone.  Like she was a nurse at one of those hospitals and she fell in love with a retard and kidnapped him and dumped him out of his wheelchair at a pool.  Now they can finally be together.  And these pictures are the evidence in her trial.

(picture source = mavrix online)

melissa theuriau is in miami

By brendon March 01, 2009 @ 3:22 PM

Just a few more picture of Melissa Theuriau and MonkeyMan.  It really is remarkable to see one of the most beautiful women in the world with someone this visually disturbing.  The fact that this dude not only got this girl but married her and then had a kid with her should serve as a source of inspiration for ordinary people like you and your friends.  Doesn't help me though.  I’m a hunk.  

(image source = mavrix online)