By Bill March 07, 2013 @ 12:39 PM
Some people call Mila Kunis the perfect girl. She’s smart, she’s funny, she’s talented, and she’s hot. But she did let McCauley Caulkin suckle her teat for almost almost a decade, then bounced into the sack with Ashton Kutcher, and, at some point, you’ve got to judge a woman by the company she beds. We don’t judge men by the same standard, which is completely unfair, but then so is prostate cancer and dying younger. We’ve all got our burdens to shoulder.
Here’s Mila in the new Allure magazine, where chicks get to stare at other chicks and imagine they’re outlet shopping together. So, basically porn for women.
By brendon February 14, 2013 @ 12:37 PM
I’ve been on enough first dates to recognize when a girl is bored and disinterested, which is exactly how Mila Kunis looked last night at the Hollywood premiere of ‘Oz: The Great and Powerful’. It’s not as if I just went through and picked out the pictures where she wasn’t smiling, and even though that’s not true, and I did in fact do that exact thing, there are STILL a lot of pictures here where she looks like she has no interest in this whatsoever.
So a half-truth is good enough. At least according to my girlfriend, who swore she didn’t have sex with “a guy” when she went to Miami last week.
(image source = getty)
By brendon December 11, 2012 @ 2:48 PM
Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis went to a Thai massage parlor in LA last night, and while waiting for Mila to finish up, Ashton dug through her purse, took out her phone and started scrolling through it. Maybe for some harmless reason, maybe because he’s jealous and was spying on her. One thing for sure is that Mila Kunis looks like hell after massages. What did they do, throw her in the dryer?
(image source = inf)
By brendon October 08, 2012 @ 9:04 AM
It’s that – time – of year – again, when the persnickety queers at Esquire go on Google Trends to find a popular actress and pretend as if they like girls for more than shoe shopping and gossip. It’s the 2012 Sexiest Woman Alive, the winner is Mila Kunis, and as always, the article is as creepy as a priest gently brushing your face with the back of his hand.
“A brief encounter with the most beautiful, opinionated, talkative, and funny movie star that we’ve all known since she was nine.”
I FUCKING HAVE NOT! And I looked it up, I doubt anyone else has either, so there’s no reason on earth this “sexy” article should be talking about a 9 year old. God it’s like getting a valentine from Jerry Sandusky. And that’s how it starts. Here’s how it ends:
“It’s 10:30 now and she wants to take a walk. She’s a little hungry, and it’s a beautiful night, and no one even knows she’s here.”
Oh Jesus Christ. Please tell me someone has seen Mila Kunis in the past few days. This sounds less like an interview and more like a real-time confession.
By brendon September 12, 2012 @ 5:36 PM
Getting trapped in an elevator with Mila Kunis sounds like a movie you’d have to go see on Valentines Day, but that really happened for 45 minutes on Sunday in New York until fire fighters came to the rescue.
Unlike the Valentines Day movie however, she was trapped with “up to 10 other people”. Whatever the hell that means. I don’t mean to brag but I’m pretty sure I could accurately count all the people in my elevator if you gave me 45 minutes.
(source = page six, image source = fhm, gq)
By brendon August 20, 2012 @ 6:05 PM
KID ROCK – gave a house to a soldier who lost his leg in Afghanistan. In a related story, Lindsay Lohan gave hepatitis to a guy with heroin from Afghanistan. (radar)
WAYNE BRADY – has apologized for a joke he told about Jeffrey Ross and Trig Palin, who has Downs syndrome, at the Roseanne Barr Comedy Central Roast. “People hate you, especially Sarah Palin because you remind her of what Trig is going to look like when he’s 40.” When asked for a comment, Trig said “Dinosaur.” (huff post)
PHYLLIS DILLER – died this morning at her home in Los Angeles at the age of 95, due to complications from not being some kind of immortal vampire. (la times)
MINKA KELLY MILA KUNIS – went to the gas station in super tight workout pants. And now I have super tight regular pants. (perverted update – I honestly was only staring at her ass and never looked at her face and thought the agency said it was minka kelly. as was pointed out on twitter, it’s not. image source = splash)