When you surround yourself with one kind of person long enough, you start to think all people are like that. Date a bunch of dirty whores for a year or two, then go out with an accountant and she’s gonna look pretty surprised when you nonchalantly pound it in her ass.
In a related story, Charlie Sheen went on stage last night in Columbus, Ohio, and announced that he wants MIla Kunis to be his third girlfriend, along with the porn star and marijuana model. The Huffington Post says…
“Here’s the good news - my goddesses have already f**king approved her. She’s pre-approved!” Sheen said.
“I would have great tolerance for many missing items provided it involves Mila f**king Kunis: If Mila Kunis is stealing your s**t , trust me, you’re still f**king winning, you’re still winning at that moment.”
Sheen told the audience how he plans on luring her.
“I’m going to go on her Facebook page and discover her likes,” Sheen said. “I’m going to buy them all and then she can come steal them. A super f**king hot thief named Mila Kunis. Mila, please, we we have a warehouse full of your favorite s**t to steal.”
I wonder if that’s why he was scaring Sarah Hyland a few weeks ago. She looks like an adolescent Mila Kunis. More importantly; really? People are really paying to see this jackass ramble on about nothing? I’m Irish. If I wanted to see some abusive drunk take off his shirt and scream profanity I’d go to my family reunions.
A source close to Mila Kunis needs to go back to Rumor Killing School because they tell People that Mila is not the reason Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel broke up, making this the first time many even heard that rumor.
“Mila had nothing to do with their break-up,” the source says. “In fact, no one came between them. They decided their relationship ran its course and it was time to move on.”
Still not suspiciously defensive enough? Good because they continue…
“(Mila and Justin are) not in a relationship,” the source says. “They star in a movie called Friends with Benefits but they’re just friends. That’s it. They are not together.”
Hopefully this mastermind won’t ever get pulled over by the cops on the way to a crime. “Where are you going?” “Well I don’t know what you heard but I’m certainly not on my way to rob the Bank of the West in Thousand Oaks if thats what you’re hinting at.”
It’s a shame Mila Kunis doesn’t have bigger tits, because she at least tried to show them off last night at the Academy Awards, and that really means a lot to me. I really appreciate that. That’s why I emailed her some pictures of my dong, and she can use those to look at when she masturbates or whatever. I don’t want her to think this is a one way street.
One reason why Black Swan got so much attention is because there’s a scene where Mila Kunis essentially pounces on Natalie Portman and goes down on her. Another reason was Darren Aronofskys ability to tell a complex story about a downward spiral into madness. But really it was that first one, about lesbians and pussy.
“Good Will Hunting” came out in 97, and from then until 04 Ben Affleck was in 25 movies. Since 04, he’s been in 6. For 7 years the dude was in anything on film, even like security cam footage from bank robberies and he led the Channel 5 Trouble Shooter Team in Denver for 6 months. So it was smart to bail for a while. Now he can do ensemble stuff like this and it looks good again, as opposed to stuff like “Daredevil”. I couldn't get an erection for 12 weeks after I saw that piece of shit.
Mila Kunis was filming a new movie yesterday and holy god she is good looking. The movie is called "Extract", but it should just be called "Mila Kunis Prances Around In Next To Nothing And At One Point It Feels Like You Can Kinda See Her Tits". Everyone would enjoy a movie like that. And you could just call it "MKPAINTNAAOPIFLYCKSHT" for short.
