A Pennsylvania high schooler named Patrick Farves was suspended for three days last week after he defied orders and carried out a plan to ask Miss America Nina Davuluri to his prom during her speech at the school. According to the local paper, Patrick has a reputation for such convoluted stunts and cries for attention, so the Central York High School officials found out it was coming and issued the warning to him in advance. He knew the risk but still desperately wanted to be the cool kid, and now he’s the focus of a really fucking stupid national debate about whether or not he should have been suspended.
The answer to the argument is, of course, “Who honestly cares if he had to sit in the bad kids room at school for three days all because some old people don’t have a sense of humor about his tired, unoriginal antics?” There are plenty of worse things that he could have done to become a headline, and I think that’s why Nina issued this statement in his defense.
“On Thursday, a student invited me to prom and gave me a flower while I was giving a presentation in York, Pennsylvania. I was flattered by the gesture although I am unfortunately unable to attend due to my travel schedule. I later learned of the disciplinary action taken and reached out to the school in hopes that they will reconsider their decision.”
Thanks for the input, Nina, but the fact still remains that every male high school student who thinks it’s original, cute or clever to ask a famous woman to prom should be suspended for at least a week from here on out.