Monica Lewinsky Is Anti-Fappening

Like most magazines, Vanity Fair editors are hoping to die before their print editions are formally shut down. There's no gimmick that won't be tried to keep from being flushed. Vanity Fair hired Monica Lewinsky to pen a series of first-woman essays on topics important to their readers. Lewinsky seemed to run out of ideas after her first article where she laid on a couch seductively and waxed philosophically like she...read more

Monica Lewinsky Doesn't Like Being the Butt

Monica Lewinsky was offended by a reference to herself while watching Orange Is The New Black. She penned an online summary of her experience in which she bestows heroic status on herself for having the courage to write the article. In the Netflix show, one lazily developed archetypical women's prison character said in reference to trying to frame a male guard: "Lewinsky that shit... get some splooge on your uniform."...read more

Monica Lewinsky Is Finally Speaking

If you're like me, you've been waiting patiently for sixteen years to hear the chubby intern speak. Who could believe the day would arrive when we can finally hear from the doughy minx who blew her boss. I've decided, finally, to stick my head above the parapet so that I can take back my narrative and give a purpose to my past. Well, that's the worst beginning to a tawdry office sex story I've ever heard. Is this a...read more

Monica Lewinsky Lingerie Up for Auction

The entire Clinton sex scandal could've been bypassed if Clinton had just nailed a good looking woman. You cigar bang a then 20-something Angelina Jolie or maybe a Cameron Diaz and outside of a few whack jobs, every dude in the world is thinking, yeah, I know, me too. Hall pass. But he didn't. He played kinky bedroom games with a chubby intern who was President of her soap opera fan club. That thong-snapping roly-poly...read more