Yahoo Lied, People Died, Or Just Got Really Bored

Yahoo abidesprecisely becauseeverybody errantly pronounces themdead. Like Jason. Or the Steelers every midseason. Yahoo partnered with the NFL over the weekend to stream the first ever pro footballgame online. The Jaguars versus the Bills live from London. I could add ten exclamation points and that still sounds like a matchup you'd want to export overseas. Yahoo claimed eight billion or so people watched. But in...read more

NFL Goes Deep On Domestic Violence (VIDEO)

In shocking overcompensation for badly mishandling of the Ray Rice situation, the NFL will air this ad during the first quarter of the Super Bowl . It's part of their No More campaign to stop domestic violence and its biggest enablers, such as the NFL. The spot features a lady who is scared for her life calling 911 and pretending to calmly order a pizza while her abusive partner is in the room. The operator is...read more

NFL Pounces on Ball Deflater Scum

According to the NFL, the New England Patriots under-pressurized balls from the AFC Championship Game were the result of a lone gunman. A locker room attendant who was seen on video tape taking the big bag of game balls and disappearing into the toilet stallfor ninety seconds.There are only so many things you can do in a bathroom with twenty four fresh ballsand a minute and a half, one of which apparently involves...read more

Football Is Violent (VIDEO)

Apparently getting blacked out at noonand watching people spear each other can lead to violence. Especially when your team loses and the beers are threedollars. Your wife hates you. Take it out on the dude next to you wearing the wrong colors. With any luck he has a jiujitsu belt and will simply incapacitate you until Security arrives. This isn't the 1980's. People watch Jon Jones and know how to murder at random with...read more

Some Girls Are Pissed At Each Other Over Football

A 28-year old girl named Lauren Silberman paid $275 to kick footballs in front of some NFL scouts this weekend, because she thought that her background in college soccer qualified her to be a professional place kicker for an actual NFL team. She attempted two kicks and failed miserably, with her first kick going 19 whole yards and the second a whopping 13 yards. And like any humiliated, failed athlete, she...read more