Julio Jones Is Real Life Rose From Titanic

Would a construction worker bring fine white garments to a site and expect to not get dirty? So why bring earrings the price of a small house with you jet skiing? read more

Bill Belichick Freedom Fighter

If you're over the age of 60 and Caucasian, chances are most people think you're racist. But Bill Belichick doesn't care about your feelings or what you think. read more

Viagra Pulls Out

The NFL stands at risk of only making ten bazillion dollars next year in advertising as truck companies realize those Chevy real people not actors commercials are super creepy and Viagra and Cialis are now ditching football. read more

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Yahoo Lied, People Died, Or Just Got Really Bored

Yahoo abides precisely because everybody errantly pronounces them dead. Like Jason. Or the Steelers every midseason. Yahoo partnered with the NFL over the weekend to stream the first ever pro football game online. The Jaguars versus the Bills live from London. I could... read more

NFL Goes Deep On Domestic Violence (VIDEO)

In shocking overcompensation for badly mishandling of the Ray Rice situation, the NFL will air this ad during the first quarter of the Super Bowl . It's part of their No More campaign to stop domestic violence and its biggest enablers, such as the NFL. The spot features... read more

NFL Pounces on Ball Deflater Scum

According to the NFL, the New England Patriots under-pressurized balls from the AFC Championship Game were the result of a lone gunman. A locker room attendant who was seen on video tape taking the big bag of game balls and disappearing into the toilet stall for ninety... read more

Football Is Violent (VIDEO)

Apparently getting blacked out at noon and watching people spear each other can lead to violence. Especially when your team loses and the beers are three dollars. Your wife hates you. Take it out on the dude next to you wearing the wrong colors. With any luck he has a... read more

Some Girls Are Pissed At Each Other Over Football

A 28-year old girl named Lauren Silberman paid $275 to kick footballs in front of some NFL scouts this weekend, because she thought that her background in college soccer qualified her to be a professional place kicker for an actual NFL team. She attempted two kicks and... read more