One time my girlfriend and I had a new puppy and he was black with white patches and we were trying to think of a name and she said “what’s black and white and fat” and I said “Mariah Carey”. That’s not a great story or anything but I need to fill these first few lines with some kind of an intro. Anyway, fatty is pregnant now (Mariah, not the dog).
Now a source close to Mariah and husband Nick Cannon tells Radar Online the couple — who renewed their vows to celebrate their second anniversary in May — are expecting their first child.
“They’re both very excited and very happy,” dished our insider.
When contacted, Mariah’s longtime rep Cindi Berger gave Radar Online a rather cryptic comment.
“I’m not at liberty to discuss Mariah’s personal life at this time,” the publicist told Radar, a statement that did not outwardly deny the pregnancy.
Said our insider: “Mariah and Nick want to keep the pregnancy quiet as long as they can.”
Mariah once had an assistant at a press conference hold a glass of water with a straw to her lips so she wouldn’t have to bend over for herself (more). She had two assistants carry her around a video set so she wouldn’t ruin her dress (more). She demanded 20 white kittens and 100 white doves for an appearance at a Christmas event (more). She had her limo driver circle a hotel in London until they put out a red carpet lined with white candles because she refused to walk on pavement (more).
My point is that Mariah is insane (although generally considered really nice in person, oddly enough) so it will be awesome to watch her go through this. She doesn’t do anything for herself, now she has to do one of the hardest things imaginable. She’s as prepared for this as she is to survive in the woods on some kind of Bear Grylls type challenge. You might as well tell her to disarm a bomb.
TIGER WOODS - almost threw away what matters most, but his apology this morning has made up a lot of ground. EA Sports, Gillete, and Upper Deck all issued statements of support today, at least opening the door to Tigers return. What coquettish little flirts you are. (reuters)
NICK CANNON - is a complete fucking dullard. He’s described in this interview as a “comedian”. I defy anyone to point out even one answer that could possibly be considered a joke. Interviews with rape victims have more laughs than this. (wonderwall)
COP OUT - has a fantastic trailer that most will never see because it’s red band. NBC showed the bobsledder guy dying, several times, well after it happened, but apologized for Shaun Whites coach saying “shit”. Has the whole fuckin country gone nuts? (foundry)
CHERYL COLE - is a huge star back in the UK but she’s in Beverly Hills this week because her dipshit soccer star husband has been cheating on her again. Point being, tits. (splash news online)
In complete accordance to the public opinion that Mariah Carey is full of herself, she dressed up as an angel for the Halloween parties Saturday night, and her servant Nick Cannon went as, “Guy Who Will Do Anything for Money”. Not that I blame him of course. In the 8th grade I dated a fat girl one summer just because she had a pool. Advantage = Nick Cannon.
Many were wondering if there was an mp3 version of the NAS and Nick Cannon song from this video yesterday, because NAS is a victim of his own talent and accidentally gave the music he was trying to make fun of an infectious beat. God only knows why people assumed I would have that, but I went ahead and made one anyway (dl it on mediafire here, sendspace here, rapidshare here).
Another way to say this is that people wanted some racist propaganda to go, and maybe share with their friends, and they thought to themselves, “hey I bet that guy from Tyler will have some”. I’m not entirely sure how to take that.
If Nick Cannon and NAS wanted this to be a really good PSA, they probably shouldn’t have made the racist song so incredibly catchy. It’s one of the best beats I’ve heard all summer. “Eat dat watermelon, eat dat watermelon, eat dat watermelon - SHO IS GOOD!” No, don’t hide the watermelon, I want some too!
Mariah Carey and her massive tits celebrated their one year anniversary with Nick Carter Cannon last night at Moon in NYC, and Nick better lock that down because the King of Bitches is on the scene, and him and his crocodile coat are making a move. Rackin up ho’s is his game of choice, and all you motherfuckin playa hata’s betta step the fuck back.
