If one day you put on clothes that aren’t tailor made to hide all your flaws and suddenly people see that you’re kind of chubby, so much so that your publicist has to officially declare that there’s not a second person inside of you, that’s maybe not the most flattering thing in the world.
In a related story Scarlett Johansson went jogging with Sean Penn yesterday.
“Scarlett is not pregnant,” the rep says in a statement.
What about that supposed “bump” that appears in the photos?
“She’s outside running and it’s simply the placement of her shirt that is misleading,” the rep explains.
“She’s been training for The Avengers for over 4 months and is in the best shape of her life.”
It’s not the shirt, dude. It’s just Scarlett. Look at her out with her twin brother. Look at that gut! Blur out her face and this could be that “waddling asses at the mall” montage the news always shows when bikini season is right around the corner.
(image source = akm/flynet)
"Marley and Me" had its big splashy Hollywood premiere last night, and you would have to shoot me out of a cannon to get me into this theater because what lunatic thought it would be a good idea to have Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson as a young married couple trying to start a family. Her chin and his nose aren’t exactly features you want to combine, as my clumsy photoshopping proves. Regardless, while she was there Jenn was of course asked about her GQ cover. Us magazine says…
At Thursday's Los Angeles premiere of Marley & Me, Jennifer Aniston spoke out for the first time about her naked GQ cover.
"I wasn't trying to make any statement," said the 39-year-old actress, who wears only a tie on the cover.
After a reporter told her she looked hot in the January issue, Aniston replied, "So do you - hottie!"
God I wanna punch that cunt right in her face. But Katherine Heigl was there last night too and she might be an even worse human being so Jenn may get a pass. There should be a Saw that puts someone in a room with those two and a gun with one bullet. Personally I’d kill myself before the videotape even got done explaining the test.
(picture source = getty images)
Kate Hudson spent the weekend in Miami lying around on top of Owen Wilson (close up here), leading many to speculate that the two may be rekindling their romance. All that’s known for sure right now is that I look fantastic in spring colors. Light blue especially. It really makes my eyes pop.
Gosh, I can barely even count all the times I've stripped naked to go swimming in the middle of the day with one of my buddies while vacationing together in Miami, like Woody Harrelson does here with Owen Wilson. Oh, no, wait, actually it turns out I've done that 0.0 times. it might not mean they're gay, but it probably does mean they were stoned. Dudes who are baked think this kind of thing is normal. They also think it’s fucked up how cats have grandparents. By contrast, non-stoners = cats having come from somewhere seems pretty reasonable.
Jennifer Aniston is a fug clingy loser, and Owen Wilson bangs ton of Hollywood ass, so it's no wonder there are rumors now that they've started something while on the set of their new movie, "Marley and Me". The Daily Mail says:
The pair play husband and wife in the adaptation of John Grogan's memoir, and sources say there is growing chemistry between them off screen.
A crew member told American magazine Star: "The hugging didn't end when the cameras stopped rolling."
"They were very flirty together, far more than you would expect. In between takes they were hanging onto each other. They are very friendly."
Now, another source told the magazine: "She's finding out that he's a terrific guy who's fun to be around."
"Jen is known for being a recluse on set. But she's having so much fun hanging out with Owen. She's just really relaxed and happy, which is nice to see."
Jennifer Aniston is startlingly ugly, but I can't blame Owen for stabbin that just because girls are much more docile and agreeable after sex. He's probably doing it just so she'll shut up and leave him alone. I certainly can relate. Those porn movies expect me to perform every time. I'm not a machine you know. Can't I just watch?
(picture source = bauer griffin)
Us magazine follows up tonight on the rumor that Owen Wilson and Jessica Simpson are now kinda sorta maybe dating. They say:
After reconnecting at the Spicewood, Texas set of a Willie Nelson music video on October 15, Simpson, 27, and Wilson, 38, have been spotted getting friendly at bars from coast to coast.
On October 28, the couple hung out in a cabana at The Huntley Hotel in Santa Monica, California. A week later, they were seen again dining at New York's Waverly Inn before heading to the Rose Bar, where a witness tells Us Weekly, "Jessica was touching Owen's arm and flipping her hair." In return, the fellow patron says, "Owen was charming, making Jessica laugh…it felt very date-y."
But are these two singletons looking to settle down, or keep playing the field? A source close to Wilson tells Us, "Owen finds Jessica hilarious, but he's talking to lots of girls."
Hilarious? You could describe Jessica Simpson a lot of different ways, but funny probably wouldn't be one of them. Unless your idea of funny is something awkward and uncomfortable like a birthday party pony collapsing because the fat kid got on. Oh, uhh, never mind. I hadn't pictured that until just now.
