It’s official now, but Patrice O’Neal died last night due to complications from the stroke he suffered last month, and sorry I’m so slow to update the page today but someone told me about this this morning and I’ve been surprisingly depressed about it. I hate that the word “genius” gets thrown around so much, I heard it this weekend about a guy who was really good at bbq, because Patrice was a fucking genius. This really sucks.
10.26.2011 Patrice O’Neal had a stroke
Patrice O’Neal is, without question, one of the smartest and funniest people on earth, and I really hope he stays that way because it was announced on Opie and Anthony this morning that he had a stroke.
It’s not clear right now how bad it was or how he’s doing, but you can Opie or Jim Norton or Sam Roberts on twitter for updates, and if want you can email something nice to loveforpatrice@gmail.com, even though that sounds more like a dating site for plus-sized girls.
12.21.2010 Tracy Morgan had a kidney transplant
(why would a 42 year old have organs randomly shutting down? maybe the story Jay Mohr told on Opie and Anthony about him and Tracy doing PCP is related in some way)
Tracy Morgan has had diabetes since 1996 but, and this is gonna amaze you, but he says he didn’t really take it seriously or take care of himself until 2006 when he got sick and almost had his foot amputated. But since then he’s turned things around and things are going great.
Oh wait never mind no they’re not.
Tracy Morgan had a kidney transplant and will miss at least two episodes of the NBC sitcom.
Morgan had successful surgery “on or around Dec. 10,” and the show’s writers will work his absence into the show by saying he had “some sort of meltdown because of a good thing that’s happened to him.”
Morgan, who plays Tracy Jordan on “30 Rock,” could miss up to three episodes, depending of his recovery, with his missed episodes slated to air in March.
You can’t help but be impressed by NBC’s obvious concern. About their TV show at least. Not so much for their employee. “We need to stop casting, you know, those people. They’re always getting diabetes, I think they like it,” NBC probably said.
It’s been two years since Wesley Snipes was convicted of tax evasion, and he’s managed to stay out of jail all this time, but today a judge denied his request for a new trial and ordered Snipes to surrender and begin his sentence. E! says…
“The defendant Snipes had a fair trial,” U.S. District Judge Terrell Hodges wrote in his 17-page ruling. “He has had a full, fair and thorough review of his conviction and sentence by the Court of Appeal; and he has had a full, fair and thorough review of his present claims, during all of which he has remained at liberty.
“The time has come for the judgment to be enforced.”
Translation: the 48-year-old actor needs to report to the U.S. Bureau of Prisons ASAP to begin his 36-month sentence.
OK I have a paralyzing migraine today, so sry the page has been so slow, but I promise the video of Wesleys first 5 minutes in jail, from Opie and Anthonys animation festival with Patrice O’Neal, will make up for it.
02.19.2010 read this palm you gypsy bitch
Some Romanian woman was accused of abusing children and when visited by the police, she slapped one of them. I don’t speak Gypsy, but according to Patrice O’Neal, after that the cop inquired if she might perhaps read his fortune. Knowing what a rush she must have been in, he showed her his palm as quickly as possible. After that she looked sad, perhaps because she saw something scary in the future.
(source = opie and anthony and patrice o’neal)
06.28.2009 Victims should not be mocked
I suppose it’s possible that Megan Fox will let you bang her in the ass before midnight tonight, but short of that the most awesome thing that will happen to you all day is when you hear Opie and Anthony (official site here) and the great Patrice O’Neal listen to a now very famous youtube video.
This has astoundingly NSFW language, so keep that in mind if co-workers would object to the sounds of anal rape and then you pounding your desk in uncontrolled spasms of laughter.
