Patrick Schwarzenegger and Bella Thorne Evening Out

April 10, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Bella Thorne, who is either seventeen or thirty-five depending on how you read her jimmied up Hawaiian birth certificate, is the latest chick to be out to dinner with the Patrick Schwarzengger. The lithesome USC undergrad is supposed to... READ MORE

Miley’s Fans Threaten Every Girl Patrick Schwarzenegger Has Ever Touched

March 20, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Patrick Schwarzenegger doesn’t look much like his dad, maybe if his dad had taken multivitamins and tap classes instead of steroid doping and military presses. Still, you’d best look out for a dude whose dad fucked everything with a... READ MORE

Patrick Schwarenegger Playing the Vagina Field And Shit Around The Web

March 16, 2015 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Patrick Schwarzenegger might be stepping out on Miley Cyrus. He was spotted getting intimate with some random party chick in Cabo. It’s possible the couple have a hall pass relationship, with Schwarzenegger choosing ‘girls who don’t look like marmosets’ for his... READ MORE

The Haunting Patrick Schwarzenegger Tattoo

January 28, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I lost track of Miley Cyrus’ tits like ten tits ago. But that Arnold Maria crucifix tattoo on the side of Patrick Schwarzenegger continues to vex me. When you’re a celebrity kid who sort of acts and attends ‘some... READ MORE

Miley Cyrus Topless With Patrick Schwarzenegger

January 27, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m not coming to bury Miley Cyrus. I’m coming to praise her. Not her twink body and the excessive tats or how she used black magic to make Maxim designate her the best looking woman in the universe and slit... READ MORE

Schwarzenegger’s Kid Promotes His Biz Well

December 31, 2014 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Patrick Schwarzenegger has been pounding Miley Cyrus for a while pro bono. At this point it makes sense to strap a billboard on her. Schwarz’s goblin headed mom has invested in an up and coming pizza chain called Blaze. This... READ MORE

Maria Shriver Is Anti Miley Cyrus

December 11, 2014 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Maria Shriver reportedly disapproves of her potentially legitimate child Patrick Schwarzenegger dating Miley Cyrus because she’s best known for getting wasted and having midgets spread her ass cheeks for screaming teens and naughty Hungarian men who remember strip clubs under Communist... READ MORE

Miley Cyrus Handles Her Schwarzenegger

December 8, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Miley Cyrus finally found a fella that makes her smile even when she’s morning almost sober. You can’t really do better than a Schwarzengger. The way Maria and Arnold banged the shit out of everybody but each other for... READ MORE

Patrick Schwarzenegger Rides a Giant Pool Sweep

June 18, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Patrick Schwarzenegger is the heir apparent to dear old dad. He’s already boning hot models, runs a couple stupid rich kid businesses, and can give one hell of a speech about philanthropy while doing so. While the rest of... READ MORE

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Son Is A Tough Guy

May 7, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

It must be pretty cool to be the son of the star of such legendary action films as The Terminator, Total Recall and Jingle All the Way, as Arnold Schwarzenegger was Hollywood’s biggest badass for at least two decades.... READ MORE


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