Patrick Schwarzenegger and Bella Thorne Evening Out

Bella Thorne, who is either seventeen or thirty-five depending on how you read her jimmied up Hawaiian birth certificate, is the latest chick to be out to dinner with the Patrick Schwarzengger. The lithesome USC undergrad is supposed to be sworn in body and bacterial stew to Miley Cyrus but he seems to be captured routinely in photos out with other women. It's possible these two socially evolved millennials have an...

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Miley's Fans Threaten Every Girl Patrick Schwarzenegger Has Ever Touched

Patrick Schwarzenegger doesn't look much like his dad, maybe if his dad had taken multivitamins and tap classes instead of steroid doping and military presses. Still, you'd best look out for a dude whose dad fucked everything with a heartbeat and a hairnet during his marriage to mom. Earlier this week, the Schwarzenegger kid who is doing 'some USC' hit Cabo San Lucas with his fraternity brothers for a break from being...

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Patrick Schwarenegger Playing the Vagina Field And Shit Around The Web

Patrick Schwarzenegger might be stepping out on Miley Cyrus. He was spotted getting intimate with some random party chick in Cabo.It's possible the couplehave a hall pass relationship, with Schwarzenegger choosing 'girls who don't look like marmosets' for his catch-all pass. Check out Patrick's new lay. (TMZ) Everyone loves a hot girl in red lipstick. (The Chive) Metisha Schaefer shows off her thong-covered booty. (...

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The Haunting Patrick Schwarzenegger Tattoo

I lost track of Miley Cyrus' tits like ten tits ago. But that Arnold Maria crucifix tattoo on the side of Patrick Schwarzenegger continues to vex me. When you're a celebrity kid who sort of acts and attends 'some USC', your main job is not to get DUIs or stupid fucking tattoos. Nobody ever listens. Getting the first names of your cheating divorced parents crossworded into the sign of the cross on your body seems...

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Miley Cyrus Topless With Patrick Schwarzenegger

I'm not coming to bury Miley Cyrus. I'm coming to praise her. Not her twinkbody and the excessive tats or how she used black magic to make Maxim designate her the best looking woman in the universe and slit their own throats in the process. Not her music or her stage show or the midgets or inflatable cocks or dead presidents or auto-tune or buck teeth or spastic limbs or hideous levels of corrupting the world's...read more

Schwarzenegger's Kid Promotes His Biz Well

Patrick Schwarzenegger has been pounding Miley Cyrus for a while pro bono. At this point it makes sense to strap a billboard on her. Schwarz's goblin headed mom has invested in an up and comingpizza chain called Blaze. This means he's either snagging some of that money or just promoting it non stop so the shadow ops don't have him disappeared. This chick is stoned enough she doesn't know what she's wearing. Tell her...

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Maria Shriver Is Anti Miley Cyrus

Maria Shriver reportedly disapproves of her potentially legitimate child Patrick Schwarzenegger dating Miley Cyrusbecause she's bestknown for getting wasted and having midgets spread her ass cheeks for screaming teens and naughty Hungarian men who remember strip clubs under Communist rule. Shriver reportedly cancelled her trip to Art Basel in Miami when she found out Cyrus would be there with her son smoking a joint...

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Miley Cyrus Handles Her Schwarzenegger

Miley Cyrus finally found a fella that makes her smile even when she's morning almost sober. You can't really do better than a Schwarzengger. The way Maria and Arnold banged the shit out of everybody but each other for thirty years, it's hard to declare his lineage with any certainty, but I bet he's hoping his dad's a foreign diplomat with real hair, not the incoherent roid bastard who cold porked the maid. Those are...

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Patrick Schwarzenegger Rides a Giant Pool Sweep

Patrick Schwarzenegger is the heir apparent to dear old dad. He's already boning hot models, runs a couple stupid rich kid businesses, and can give one hell of a speech about philanthropy while doing so. While the rest of the family seems shattered and getting made fat by the unshocking revelation of Arnold banging a baby into the housemaid, Patrick seems to be enjoying the hell out of himself off in St. Tropez. He's...

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Arnold Schwarzenegger's Son Is A Tough Guy

It must be pretty cool to be the son of the star of such legendary action films as The Terminator, Total Recall and Jingle All the Way, as Arnold Schwarzenegger was Hollywood's biggest badass for at least two decades. But Patrick Schwarzenegger, who has carved himself a nice little niche as an extra in Adam Sandler movies, is apparently trying to establish his own bad boy street cred now, as he was tossed from the...

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Patrick Schwarzenegger Is Banging His Mom

Somebody is not handling his parents messy divorce so well. Patrick Schwarzenegger is nineteen, rich, and the male model scion of a famous family. He's the toast of teen girls discovering their sexuality by way of Tiger Beat celebrity day dreams in the bathtub. He can literally have sex with any young women on this planet. But he's gone with Taylor Burns. A woman who looks like his mom. I bet he cries during sex...

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Thursday headlines, with Michelle Hunziker in a bikini

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER - had lunch with his son Patrick today, and things seem to go fine. Which sucks because wouldn't it be badass if he went all apeshit with some kind of Oedipus complex. The Kennedys are all nuts so I figure there's still time. (popeater) KIM KARDASHIAN - is now engaged of course, but was the proposal filmed as footage for her reality show? Oh gosh, I wonder what the answer is. (people) JANE LYNCH...read more