By Lex October 30, 2015 @ 12:19 PM
Dianna Agron, that chick you watched Glee for for ten seconds because she’s blond and good looking and dressed like a cheerleader finally got topless ten years later. Maybe it’s been eight or six, I don’t know. Had she been topless on Glee I might’ve DVRed. Minus the parts where all the male characters sing the phrase ‘yucky girls’ but plus the TV magic moment when Jane Lynch dips one in the pink, one in the stink on the perky high schooler to help her feel like a woman. As punishment for the wait, producers made Agron open mouth kiss Paz De La Huerta, which frenzied the billions of primordial viral cells in her body desperate for a fresh host. Alls well that ends well. Agron breasts, we’ll see you again in twenty years in a Greenwich Playhouse revival of Hair. Paz, probably later tonight outside a Sunset club.
Photo Credit: “Bare” Purple Milk
By brendon November 27, 2012 @ 4:29 PM
Boardwalk empire star Paz de la Huerta was walking around Miami with one of her beloved cigarettes, when she stopped to change out of her bikini into a little mini skirt. In a parking lot. An outdoor parking lot. At around noon. Then she got into a fancy car with some guy and drove away.
When asked for a comment, Lindsay Lohan said, “Hey, look, it happens. Even if you’re a well known actress, sometimes you have get dressed up and go blow a rich guy in a car for money. Lots of actresses do it. I know for a fact that Helen Mirren does it.”(*)
(*)NOTE: Helen Mirren does not do that, she does not blow guys in cars for money. She does it because it’s exciting and sexy. image source = bauer griffin)
KATY PERRY – will tie Michael Jacksons record if her 5th single off ‘Teenage Dream’ goes to number 1 like the other 4 have. And also if she gets two dozen little boys drunk and blows them. (mtv)
CARS 2 – is the worst reviewed Pixar movie ever, and not coincidentally they’ve now unveiled the characters for ‘Brave’, their first movie with a female protagonist. So I guess it’s about girl problems, like when there are no tampons in the ladies room. (joblo)
THE SUPERMAN REBOOT – will have Julia Ormond joining Russell Crowe as Supermans parents on Krypton before it explodes. Because this will tell the Superman origin story. Yet again. Otherwise no one would know what was going on. “There’s a new director now, so naturally I assumed the character would be completely different,” audiences will no doubt say to one another. “By showing me what I already know and saw in two other movies, I’m now reassured that Superman is still exactly the same as always. And it was great. I enjoy watching the same story over and over and over again. I’m like a fucking toddler.” (deadline)
MEN IN BLACK 3 – will cost $215 million, mostly because Will Smith is a pain in the ass. (the wrap)
JERSEY SHORE – will have an all new cast next year. Either that or they won’t, because MTV is denying these reports. As if they could ever find 8 more drunk Italians in New Jersey. (hollywood reporter)
PETER FALK – died “peacefully at his Beverly Hills home” last night at the age of 83, according to his family. But maybe their story comes unraveled if the detective says there’s “Just one more thing…” right before leaving. It can’t hurt to try. (ew)
PAZ DE LA HUERTA – walked around NYC on the phone. Presumably with someone asking what her tits felt like. (inf)