Javier Bardem took time off from starring as Jeffrey Dean Morgan in the Raul Julia Story to go to Brazil and have Penelope Cruz stick a finger up his ass. And good for him. That’s what life is all about. The last thing you want is to be on your death bed wondering if Penelope Cruz would have stuck her finger up your ass. The not knowing, that’s what would haunt you.
(source = fame pictures)
These pictures of Monica Cruz (sister of Penelope Cruz) on a beach in Ibiza today looked hotter when they were thumbnails, but she still looks better than Katy Perry so there you go.
Latin chicks are always tan and they have gorgeous long hair, but they’re all nuts. It’s a terrible combination. They’re super hot, but they’ll also stab you. Thankfully many of them have no tits and a big ass so even if they’re hot it’s not a problem. If you see one with a nice ass and big tits, beware. That’s natures warning sign to stay back, like how cobras do that thing with their neck.
(4 more here. hq jump here. image source = flynet online)
ANNA NICOLE SMITH - if the actions of Howard K. Stern directly led to her death, he could be charged with secondary murder or involuntary manslaughter, which is less serious, even though it sounds way worse. “Slaughter”. It's like he hacked her to pieces with a machete. (source = e!)
NBC – averaged just 6 million prime time viewers last week, and even lost the 18-34 demo to a Spanish cable channel. Oh I know. I'm shocked. Winning “Worlds Greatest Grandpa” according to your tshirt is more impressive than being the lead in “Chuck”. (source = defamer)
PENELOPE CRUZ – I thought this was old, but the Sun has a headline about Penelope Cruz topless in some movie. I didn’t read the article because I got this intriguing email: “Your rod will be faultless weapon. Women will be your resigned slaves.” And they link to the pills that will turn my cock into a baseball bat of seduction. I was skeptical at first, but the site has a picture of a woman with a clipboard. Her endorsement really put me at ease. (unedited pic here, source = sun UK)
Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem have dated for almost a year now, and here they are spending Easter Sunday in Nice, France. By the way, if you care about any of this, congratulations, you're a fucking weirdo.
The nominees for the 79th Academy Awards were announced this morning, and "Dreamgirls" leads the pack with 8 nominations, including Best Supporting Actor for Eddie Murphy and Best Supporting Actress for Jennifer Hudson. Surprisingly, it did not receive nods for Best Picture or Best Director. "Dreamgirls" has long been considered the front runner to win both those awards. The nominees are:
BEST PICTURE: BABEL, THE DEPARTED, LETTERS FROM IWO JIMA, LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE, THE QUEEN
BEST DIRECTOR: Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu (Babel,) Martin Scorsese (The Departed,) Clint Eastwood (Letters from Iwo Jima,) Stephen Frears (The Queen) and Paul Greengrass (United 93)…
BEST ACTOR: Leonardo DiCaprio (Blood Diamond,) Ryan Gosling (Half Nelson,) Peter O'Toole (Venus,) Will Smith (The Pursuit of Happyness,) Forest Whitaker (The Last King of Scotland)
BEST ACTRESS: Penelope Cruz (Volver,) Judi Dench (Notes on a Scandal,) Helen Mirren (The Queen,) Meryl Streep (The Devil Wears Prada,) Kate Winslet (Little Children)
In my mind, the real surprise here is Ryan Gosling. Not that he's on the list, but that he's even working in Hollywood and having sex with Rachel McAdams. He's so damn average, and she's so damn pretty. You could send me to do an interview with him, and replace him with a plank of wood that someone put a little hat on and I'm not positive I would even notice. I would just think he was being stuck up. And I dare you to make less sense than him and Rachel. Pictures of him with her make no sense, they don't even look real, it's like when you go to Universal Studios and get a picture of yourself shaking hands with President Bush or as Sportsmen of the Year. There's just no way this dork is really with this angel.
See the full list of nominees HERE.
