Phillip Seymour Hoffman Was A Solid Dad

By Matt July 21, 2014 @ 11:47 AM


Phillip Hoffman didn’t leave any money to his kids. He didn’t want his children to be trust fund brats, which he helped insure by blowing liberal amounts of their inheritance on heroin. In his own dad is laying naked in a flop house shitter with surgical tubing around his arm kind of way, he was a great father. Apart from not giving them any money, Hoffman took the step of guilt tripping his kids into living in areas with inflated rent:

“It is my strong desire my son, Cooper Hoffman, be raised and reside in or near the borough of Manhattan, Chicago, Illinois, or San Francisco, California,”

Maybe through his purple haze he might have checked the housing section on Craigslist and noticed the only people who can afford to live in San Francisco anymore are trust fund kids and Google executives. In passing down pretty much nothing but his addict genes he could have at least left enough dough for up to three sober living housing stints per child. I like the concept of not wanting to turn your kids into Brandon Davis or Paris Hilton, but I’m not sure merely cutting off their welfare checks from beyond the grave is the answer. There’s something to be said for providing life lessons pre-morten to the little ones. You know, other than I love you, Little Cooper, just not quite as much as getting super fucking high.

Photo Credit: Getty Images


Drake Didn’t Like Philip Seymour Hoffman Stealing His Spotlight

By Michael February 13, 2014 @ 5:42 PM

Jimmy from Degrassi is griping about losing his Rolling Stone cover to Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Drake was slated for the cover for an interview in which he boldly stated Kanye West’s Yeezus album wasn’t very good. But he got bumped for the overdosed Oscar winner. This made Drake so mad he jumped up and down like a Canadian toddler that spilled his poutine at the Tim Horton’s. He tweeted,

“I never commented on Yeezus for my interview portion of Rolling Stone. They also took my cover from me last minute and ran the issue. I’m disgusted with that. RIP to Phillip Seymour Hoffman. All respect due. But the press is evil.”

Yes, the press is soooo evil. Drake went and deleted his toolish Tweet blaming Hoffman for dying and stealing his much-deserved Rolling Stone cover. He followed up with the more generic ‘I’m quitting the press’ snit. Wonderful my man. How about a bag on your head as well?  Of course, if Drake wants to really ensure himself a Rolling Stone cover, let Hoffman guide his actions thusly.