R Kelly Is Sensitive To Rape Questions And Shit Around The Web

Musical artist and pounder of young flesh R Kelly got pissed off during a live interview with the Huffington Post and stormed off. He became angry when the interviewer asked him about his multiple underaged sexual assault charges.Everybody has their buttons. Though not... read more

Music Protests R Kelly

Two Ohio based bands have dropped out of The Fashion Meets Music Festival because one of the Festival headliners is underaged girl loving R Kelly. Saintseneca, a band as preachy as their new aged name, thought better than to share billing with Kelly: "We feel it is an... read more

R. Kelly's Daughter Is Now His Son

You can't blame a thirteen year old girl for wanting to become a boy when you're hanging around R. Kelly. Not that R. Kelly has ever been accused of incest. It's really the one sex crime standard obviously missing from his best of album. A couple weeks ago Kelly's... read more

Lady Gaga Distancing Herself from R. Kelly

Maybe it wasn't the best idea for a woman to launch a bawdy sexualized song with a known defiler of underaged girls. Lady Gaga probably didn't give a shit until her new album tanked in sales simultaneous to the uproar over R. Kelly's pissing on pubescent girlscame back... read more

R. Kelly Hates On The Haters Who Hate That He Hate Fucks Teens

R. Kelly is once again defending himself against allegations of past sexual misconduct with underaged girls. You know, like when he fucked a couple of teen girls in a sex tape and peed on them. Stuff like that. This is in the wake of the release of his latest album Black... read more

Village Voice Recounts R. Kelly's Glory Days of Raping High School Sophomores

Some people just can't let shit go. It's been fifteen years since R. Kelly kind of allegedly raped hordes of high school girls. And maybe one or three of them tried to off themselves. But it's not like R. Kelly didn't pay them all reasonably well to shut the fuck up. I'm... read more

Lady Gaga Has Fallen And She Can't Get Up

Everybody wants to know why the social outcasts from The Breakfast Clubaren't buying Lady Gaga's new album. It's so bad that when I searched Lady Gaga backdoor cucumber BDSM penetration, I got articles about how ARTPOP sucks and how Interscope is going to have to fire a... read more

R. Kelly Thinks Chris Brown Is Jesus

R. Kelly came to the defense of fellow creepy singer Chris Brown by comparing him to Muhammed Ali, Martin Luther King, and Jesus Christ. Kelly was giving an interview for his new album Black Panties when the subject of his many controversies came up. You know, like him... read more

Lady Gaga Mounts R. Kelly In Preview Mode

With only one preview shot of the forthcoming video for the Lady Gaga song about letting R. Kelly piss directly into her screeching portal, I'm already prepared to call this the musical event of the year. What could possibly go visually wrong with Megan's Law website... read more

Lady Gaga Dry Humps R. Kelly on SNL (VIDEO)

Watching Lady Gaga perform over a pre-recorded track on SNL was a valuable lesson in why you should never utter shit aloud like 'Well, this can't get any worse.' Because that's the Candyman call for R. Kelly to appear and start getting it on with fugly trainable Cousin... read more

It's About Time for a Kicked Up National Anthem

There is a new White House petition to change the national anthem to R. Kelly's Ignition (remix). The song about going to the club, drinkin', ridin' in a stretch Navigator, and gettin' yo freak on has already garnered 4300 signatures. The current anthem was written by... read more

afternoon headlines

KARL MALDEN - died today at the age of 97. He won the Academy Award in 1951 for "A Streetcar Named Desire". How did he die? What am I, a scientist? (source = yahoo) R KELLY - might have had his home raided by Chicago police today searching for evidence of statutory rape.... read more