The Kardashians Made ESPN Their Bitch

By Lex July 16, 2015 @ 9:11 AM

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Every now and then Ray J pipes up and takes credit for creating the Kardashian empire. His jizz fling was the eye of newt potion that turned that tawdry family from dead OJ accomplice and his cheating widow into a media juggernaut. Without that reality show, Bruce Jenner goes to his grave as Bruce Jenner in pants. There is no light bulb moment when an ex-athlete who can’t confront his gay starts picturing himself the world stage star of his own tranny on-camera tale. That idea never passes into this world.

Agree with it or not, when ESPN decided to feature a married lesbian female soccer player handing a courage award to Bruce Jenner with tits in a dress, they announced themselves as the politically correct me-too network that used to cover sports. Scrambling to appear to be the most open-minded and progressive institution is no different than scrambling to jump any bandwagon. In the midst of your self-congratulatory parade, you are nothing more than an opportunistic asshole. You’re not setting the tone for anything. You just look weak. Tolerance is not something you obtain by handing out undeserved awards to Bruce Jenner in a dress while forcing NBA ballers to stand and applaud. Martin Luther King, Jr. understood that equality was a road to be traveled, not a grandstand where he whipped out his black cock and had the sexually frustrated Daughters of the American Revolution local chapter President stroke it as her savior. Forcing people to choose between political correct celebrants or derision worthy intolerants is no way to achieve progress.

Kardashians, you win, again. Bruce Jenner got paid. The E! reality show starts next week. ESPN rolled over like the cell block play toy. This isn’t about advancing civil rights any more than visiting a hooker is about love. Ray J, take a bow, this is your fault.

Ray J Quits

By Matt March 25, 2015 @ 7:33 AM

RJ

Occasional rapper and stunt cock Ray J has quit Love and Hip Hop: Hollywood because he reportedly wants to spend more time with his girlfriend Princess Love who recently beat the shit out him. Ray J’s ex-girlfriend and poor woman’s Rihanna, Teairra Mari, is also a cast member and apparently this was causing some manufactured conflicts like what happens in shitty reality shows. Ray J reportedly offered to stay on the show if he could only shoot scenes he hand selected, at which point he was laughed at and threatened with the cattle prod by producers. After refusing their promises of multiple gold stars he is still off the show. If you are wondering how this will effect the show your life is wasting away before your eyes. Please wear condoms you two assholes. It’s never too late to go back to high school.

Photo Credit: Twitter 

Ray J Is Giving Kim And Kanye A Wedding Present

By Travis May 19, 2014 @ 1:00 PM

Kim and Ray J

With Kim Kardashian and Kanye West just days away from their humble, private wedding in Italy, it’s a perfect time for Ray J to hop into the picture and make himself slightly famous again. When Kim was engaged to Kris Humphries, it was reported that Ray J was sending Kim inappropriate text messages while he openly bragged about their sex tape, and now he’s basically doing the same thing, except instead of text messages, he’s sending her a check for $46,840.13. According to TMZ, that’s the total amount of money Ray J has made through four months in 2014 on his sex tape with Kim. Keep in mind, that sex tape was made in 2007 and just about everybody on Earth has seen it, so the fact that it’s still making money is fucking retarded. At this point the government should purchase it and use its profits to fund the war on terror or improve the education system so today’s teenage girls will be better prepared for their careers in porn when they turn 18.

Ray J’s ‘I Hit It First’ Is Pretty Sad (VIDEO)

By Travis April 30, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

It has been about six years since Kim Kardashian accepted $5 million from Vivid Entertainment for the release of her amateur porn that she recorded with then-unknown hip hop artist Ray J in 2003. So while Kim and now-unknown hip hop artist Ray J presumably haven’t slept together in a decade, the latter has released a new video for his single, “I Hit it First”, which is obviously directed at Kim’s current boyfriend and eventual third ex-husband Kanye West.

Ray J even hired a Kim lookalike for the new video, which would be cool if he’d produced it in 2004 and all of the lyrics were about football players. But this is just sad now. Even a guy waking up from a coma after 10 years is probably like, “Get over it, loser.”

In Desperate Need Of Attention, Ray J Fires Shots At Kanye West

By Travis April 08, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

Rapper Ray J is famous because he made a really boring sex tape with Kim Kardashian before anybody knew who she was, but while Kim went on to create a reality TV empire, Ray J is still just that dude who had sex with Kim Kardashian. Apparently that’s changing, though, because Ray J will soon star as the host of Oxygen’s Bad Girls Club All-Star Battle, and I wouldn’t have known that unless he Tweeted the above image for his new single “I Hit it First”.

The pixelated image is a callback to this picture of Kim, and the title is obviously a shot at her boyfriend and baby daddy, Kanye West. Some people have called this a bold marketing move by Ray J, but it’s been 6 years since he had sex with Kim and she’s been dating Kanye for as long as she’s been waiting to finalize her divorce from Kris Humphries. So call it what it is – some dude with a new TV show saying, “Hey everyone, look at me!”

In the good old days of rap, Ray J’s body would have been found in a dumpster 2 minutes after that picture hit the web, but knowing Kanye, he’ll probably respond by making his own sex tape with Kim during a concert for Obama at Madison Square Garden. Hell, I’d watch.

Whitney Houston has a “ton” of sex tapes

By brendon March 21, 2012 @ 3:41 PM

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Ever wanted to watch a middle-aged, former pop star in a stoned haze mumble her way through listless sex? Me neither, but we might be able to anyway, because Ray J (whose penis made it’s national video debut inside Kim Kardashians mouth) is said to have “a ton of sexually explicit photos and videos” starring him and Whitney Houston.

Star says…

The Houston family has “been in contact with Ray and told him they do not want any photos or videos painting her in a bad light to come out,” the source said, adding the famous family “explained to Ray that now is the time to honor Whitney, not drag her legacy down.”

Um, her “legacy” is that she was a girl born to a family of famous singers, and she sang a few pop songs 20 years ago and then died after pissing away a hundred million dollars on drugs, thus leaving her only daughter nothing but debt and an addictive personality. Making a sex tape actually improves her image. It’s the only worthwhile thing she’s recorded since around 1995.

CONFLICTING UPDATE – as always, TMZ is now saying the exact oppisite of Star, specifically that these tapes don’t exist.