01.19.2011 morning headlines

miranda-kerr-breastfeeding

MIRANDA KERR - posted the first picture of her son Flynn, presumably taken by her husband Orlando Bloom, and as you can see it was while he was sucking on one of her perky little tits. Which means he’s 2 weeks old and his life has probably peaked. (kora organics)

BRUCE WILLIS - was a pain in the ass to work with on Cop Out, according to director Kevin Smith. “I had no fucking help from this dude whatsoever.” And yet that movie totally worked, on every level, a modern masterpiece. The creative process sure is a mystery. (filmdrunk)

HALLE BERRY - is supposedly on good terms with her ex Gabriel Aubry, who is also the father of her 2yo daughter, but yesterday he filed for custody, setting up a potential tug-of-war with their child. Not a literal tug-of-war with their child of course, though that would be way more exciting. (e!)

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER - is ready to return to acting, perhaps playing a Nazi commander who refuses to execute POW’s at the end of WWII in With Wings As Eagles. Or perhaps playing something else, in a different movie. What am I, psychic? (fox)

RICKY GERVAIS - will not be hosting the Golden Globes again next year, saying he feels twice is enough. Which is how I now feel about watching the Golden Globes. (yahoo)

01.17.2011 Ricky Gervais is real popular in Hollywood today

One reason why Ricky Gervais has made such a name for himself in comedy is because he truly doesn’t care who he offends or annoys or if anyone gets the joke but him. He does what he thinks is funny, always. Which is evident if you watched the Golden Globes last night. For example, when he introduced Robert Downey Jr, he ended it by saying…

“But many of you in this room probably know him best from such facilities as the Betty Ford Clinic and Los Angeles County Jail.”

As you might expect, that didn’t go over so well with some people who are used to having their ass kissed at all times.

Downey Jr later said on stage: “Aside from the fact that it’s been hugely mean-spirited with mildly sinister undertones, I’d say the vibe of the show has been pretty good so far, wouldn’t you?”
Presenters Tom Hanks and his Toy Story 3 costar Tim Allen also criticized Gervais, with Hanks saying: “We recall when Ricky Gervais was a slightly chubby but very kind comedian,” to which Allen added: “Neither of which he is now.”

Others however, weren’t so uptight, according to the Hollywood Reporter.

Christian Bale: “Thank God for comedians,” he said, adding that he had no problems with Gervais’ zingers: “I’m hoping he’s going to keep going further.”

Jim Parsons (the Big Bang Theory): “It was great! I thought he was really funny. It’s like he walked up to the edge, and then he jumped right on over and didn’t look back. I was scandalized, I tell you. I think he’s hilarious and funny and whenever you’re funny, you’re gonna push some people’s buttons.’”

Al Pacino: “He’s a comic, so he’s going to go for it. He’s letting it go. The only thing he can really get to is his own wit. He has to censor himself. I’m sure he’s planned some of it - [the jokes] really fly. You don’t know what [he's] going to say!”

Heather Morris (Glee): “I thought he was hysterical. He was so dry. He’s funny as hell.”

Some stars feel like these award shows are a special night for their work to be honored and it’s not a roast and they shouldn’t be made fun of (which is why the Oscars have two actors as hosts this year) but fuck you. Your entire life is your special night. Stop doing such ridiculous shit and you won’t get made fun of. What do you want him to talk about, a fish he caught?

09.21.2009 ricky gervais at the emmys

Every single thing Ricky Gervais does is funny, and last night as he presented the Emmy for Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series was no exception. You can just look at him and tell he’s about to do something funny. Just like you can look at someone with their jeans hanging beneath their ass and tell they’re about to break one or more laws, probably upside your ass.

01.12.2009 ricky gervais at the golden globes

This video quality sucks, it looks like the news reports they show in zombie movies where they say not to leave the house, but it's all I could find of Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes last night, so it's worth it. He’s a bit of a novelty in Hollywood, in that he’s actually funny and really talented. Which means, if not for the fact that he owns all his stuff, in three years he'd be playing Pronunciation Panda on Nick Jr while kiss-ass hack Brett Ratner is allowed to make movie after unwatchable movie. Yaay, they system is working!

11.14.2008 RICKY GERVAIS IS AVERAGE SIZE

Ricky Gervais won't be on "Inside the Actors" studio until January, but he will be on HBO doing stand-up for an hour tomorrow night. I have no idea if he's any good or not, but Louis CK thought enough to open for him on the road a few months ago. Louis CK. The funniest person on earth. Opened for Gervais. So I take it that’s a good sign. Anyway, the point to all this is ITAS has released a clip from their show where Gervais talks about his penis. He's just one of those guys, like Chapelle or Bernie Mac, where there’s something about his cadence and delivery makes everything way funnier that it should be. Although it's very dry.   It’s the British stereotype about comedy.  More proof that stereotypes are all true.   Such as cheerleaders kiss each other in the locker room and midgets will spin straw into gold if you give them your necklace.