Rihanna Has A Lovely New Penis Purse

By Travis September 12, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Always the classiest lady at the party, Rihanna left her hotel in London yesterday looking like she stole the curtains from a restaurant at Epcot and showing off her new gift from Vivienne Westwood – a purse with a giant gold penis on the side. Naturally, because she doesn’t give a shit, Rihanna held the purse in front of her crotch and behaved like men typically do, by sticking her tongue and waving her penis around. Of course, she left out the part where we blow a load and fall asleep. Nice try, Rihanna, but no points for accuracy.

(Photo Credits: Rihanna’s Instagram)

Rihanna Steps Out Braless In New York

By Lex September 06, 2013 @ 10:21 AM

Rihanna Steps Out Braless In Short Shorts In New York

Photo Credit: INFphoto.com

Rihanna Wears A Sports Bra To American Apparel

By Lex August 20, 2013 @ 11:52 AM

Rihanna Wears A Sports Bra To American Apparel In New York

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI, PCN

Rihanna Shows Of Her Butt In A Bikini

By Lex August 14, 2013 @ 9:41 AM

Rihanna Shows Of Her Butt In A Bikini On A Boat In Barbados
I like when people have problems but declare them null and void because they ‘own them’. Fat people do this a lot. Their rotund carcasses barely contained in elastic pants like an enormous human sausage. But they own that shit, so it’s a bad thing turned on its head. It’s actually a good thing. I bet Rihanna owns being beat by Chris Brown and then going back to him. You can’t touch her on that one. She owns it. It’s like immunity. The only thing more powerful than owning, is confessing. Once you confess to something, people just forgive the shit out of you. Doing something lousy and then confessing to it is better than not having even done it in the first place. Confess in public, with a tear even, that’s equal to owning shit and confessing to the exponential of fourteen. You can literally get away with murder, or sexting random fat chicks, provided those girls own the fact that their fat. Otherwise, the whole bullshit house of cards implodes and you’re back to just being somebody with a big fucking problem.

Photo Credit: Splash

Rihanna Posts A Photo Of Her Butt On Instagram

By Lex August 08, 2013 @ 4:43 PM

Rihanna Posts Bikini Pictures To Her Instagram
Rihanna posted a picture of her ass on Instagram when her alarm went off indicating that nobody had been talking about her for over an hour. It’s not as bad as a couple years back when she found out nobody had been talking about her for an entire weekend so she got Chris Brown to punch her in the face. If she’s ever out of the spotlight for more than ten days, watch out for a school shooting.

Photo Credit: Rihanna/Instagram

Rihanna Is a Patriot

By Lex August 06, 2013 @ 11:55 AM

Rihanna Sips Out Of A Flask In A Diamond Bikini During A Carnival In Barbados
Rihanna never shies from pride in her small island nation of Barbados, noted for its tourism and mob friendly offshore banking. A couple times a year Rihanna dons the local festival costumery, gets loaded, and flashes her tits and ass. It’s like Mardis Gras in New Orleans but with much better looking drunks.

Photo Credit: Splash