Riley Keough Models Lingerie

By Lex August 05, 2013 @ 4:17 PM

I really can’t google anything more about Robert Pattinson. The NSA is going to start putting me in their F.A.G. file, which while it contains half of all the world’s most important people, I need somebody to believe I’m straight. Best I could tell before I cut that shit off, this is the girl who sad sack Robert Pattinson convinced to sympathy bang him after he moved his little box of tears of our Kristen Stewart’s place. Riley Keough is also Elvis’ granddaughter. Not that it matters. But it’s something to tell your buddies about after the fact. Unless you’re Robert Pattinson and you have no friends. Fill the box, Rob.

Photo Credit: Getty Images

Robert Pattinson Is Banging Elvis’ Granddaughter

By Lex July 03, 2013 @ 12:02 PM

Riley Keough At The 2013 Tribeca Film Festival In New York
I’ll say this for that chaffing sob monkey Robert Pattinson. Beneath all the emo, he’s still a dude. So when the spoiled brat love of his life goes and cheats on him in a messy public scandal, he does what any immature but semi-inspired man would do. He goes and bangs her friend. In this case, Riley Keough. He’s lucky Kristen had some hot friends. I’ve been there before when the revenge options are a little more daunting. Pride demands you still get in there, but it can be a challenge.

Here’s a bunch of pictures of actress Riley Keough. I don’t know much about her except she’s Elvis’ granddaughter, Kristen Stewart’s good friend, and now she’s got a mope of a method actor on top of her four nights a week trying to hold back his tears.

Photo Credit: Getty, WENN