Justin Trudeau Jizz Splashes Rolling Stone

July 27, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s impossible to accurately measure the erection Rolling Stone founder Jann Wenner achieves when he imagines coiffed Canadian politico Justin Trudeau as his natural born leader. Leave a generous tip for the hotel maid. Scraping cum off the drapes was not covered in orientation.


Kevin Gates Schools Some Science (VIDEO)

February 11, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Rolling Stone’s latest exposé is slow drawling rapper Kevin Gates d anti-vaccination advice to parent. Gates claims his three year old daughter is a baby genius thanks to never polluting her body with the mercury and used Bazooka chewing gum found commonly in white people conspiracy vaccines. Whether his daughter is smart enough to predict her […]


Rolling Stone Rape Retracts

April 6, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Rolling Stone took great care in its editorial process after its big frat gang rape on UVA campus story published last November turned out to be a shit pail of unchecked facts. They took slightly less care in deciding to print the article in the first place. Nobody wanted to be last with their scathing […]


Julia Louis-Dreyfus Is One Tit Away from Perfection

April 10, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Almost 238 years after our founding and America is still afraid of tits. I’m not sure what it is about women’s breasts that scare the shit out of so many people. Yeah, I was wary of them too until about fourteen when I touched my first and realized they weren’t going to send me straight […]


Miley Cyrus Strips Down In Rolling Stone

September 24, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Miley Cyrus knows how to commit. For her Rolling Stone interview she got the words ‘Rolling Stone’ tattooed onto the bottom of her feet. That’s so fucking punk. Then taking off her top and grabbing her own tit. I don’t know, more fucking punk. Anybody who thought Miley Cyrus was just a manufactured pop music […]