By Lex February 03, 2016 @ 10:26 AM
This chick has made an entire career out of not talking and having lips that look like she just sucked the tailpipe of a classic Buick until it surrendered. Each skill therein by itself only gets you so far. Combine the two with The Transporter making threatening phone calls to booking agents you’ll never go hungry again.
Photo Credit: Paige Denim
By Lex January 05, 2016 @ 11:08 AM
Rosie Huntington Whiteley scurried off to Thailand in the middle of the night to escape Jason Statham, but he found her. He has a certain set of abilities. Also, he’s implanted GSP tracking devices which show her precise location on his iPhone. Don’t be confused by the pictures where she appears to be alone. Her free play radius is six to ten feet depending on the prevailing population density. Beyond that, the invisible fence zaps her in her privates something fierce. Of course I’ll be here when you get back from your muscle class. Are the zip ties really necessary?
Photo Credit: AKM-GSI
By Lex November 24, 2015 @ 10:21 AM
The fashion business is one massive ruse. It’s the equivalent of telling Jacksonville Jaguars fans that this is the year. That dress looks suspiciously like something already in your closet. I know you’re paying for it yourself, but I might note that I pay for my own clothes and our rent. The entire point of designer clothing for women is to make other women jealous for not being able to fit into that same dress. A Holly Holm foot to the face is more subtle. Men might tell a woman she looks great in a dress, but what they really mean is, let’s get naked and fuck. That’s also true for ‘how was your day’ and ‘of course I love Mr. Whiskers’. Relationships are complicated. Fashion isn’t. There are five different dresses in the entire world. You own fifteen of them.
Photo Credit: Getty
By Lex November 19, 2015 @ 10:22 AM
This is a rare photo of this British model where Jason Statham doesn’t have his arm firmly wrapped around her neck like she’s figured out where he’s hidden her passport and has a cohort from the shelter ready to help her escape. Having a younger girlfriend everybody wants to fuck isn’t for everybody. Like insecure bald men with tempers. The upside is you get some world class model pussy. The downside is you’ve lost all your friends and you can no longer take your girlfriend to visit your dad. He’s in his 70′s, he can masturbate in the hallway, fuck what everybody else thinks. Put your money away, sweetheart, it’s enough to know you’re recycling.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
By Lex June 04, 2015 @ 12:43 PM
The X-Files is returning to Fox because they couldn’t think of anything relatively less derivative and nerds at lesser city Comic-Cons want one last chance to tug one out to Gillian Anderson. You’d like to think that a metropolis comprised entirely of super duper pill popping sodomites could come up with some novel programming ideas, but constantly checking your wristband to see how many feet you’ve walked today takes its toll on your total parietal output. Remember when there was a new show on network TV you were excited to watch? It was called X-Files. It’s back.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
By Matt April 10, 2015 @ 7:04 AM
Rosie Huntington-Whiteley got mostly naked for a photo shoot and as part of the trade off someone had to listen to her recount some benign facts about herself. Brace yourself, she likes to eat real food like the rest of us:
“I don’t want to be that miserable girl pushing a salad around my plate.”
One of us! One of us! I give her credit for the attempt. We know that models starve the shit out of themselves and we really don’t care. If your calorie ceiling gives me a slightly better wank, that’s a deal we’ve both made with the devil. No give-backs. She also dropped this gem:
“Beauty for me is about a good workout routine.”
I’m not exactly sure that makes sense, but I think it’s more about having great tits and your skin accepting bronzer without visible rash. More of a nature thing than a spin class thing. Jason Statham’s a lucky man. You’ve got friends that are interesting. Nobody’s perfect.
Photo Credit: Violet Grey