By Lex September 19, 2014 @ 12:16 PM
With more and more stories out that artificial sweeteners in diet soda are just making fat people die even faster, this Stevia plant sweetener is growing rapidly in popularity. It’s got few calories compared to real sugar and won’t send you into diabetic conniptions like the shit they’ve been putting in Diet Coke since people started pretending 1-calorie sodas could counteract Subway meatball grinders and eight hours in an office chair.
Coca-Cola Life is Coke’s version of Stevia sweetened cola that is making the rounds in foreign countries. They started in South America where up to 500,000 people can die mysteriously without much notice. Between making kids too fat to do wind sprints in gym and the mass distribution of aspartame, Coca-Cola kills more people annually than the influenza virus and helmet-less skateboarding combined. It’s nice to see they’re moving in the direction of using natural plant life, treating it with industrial solvents, kettle cooking it, synthesizing it in laboratories, and adding just a hint of Black Widow venom to finally produce a healthy soda. Green packaging does not lie. This soda’s going to make you a superstar.
Photo Credit: Getty, AKM-GSI
By Lex June 13, 2014 @ 11:47 AM
Photo Credit: Violet Grey
By Lex March 12, 2014 @ 3:03 PM
Rosie Huntington-Whiteley is back to doing what she does best. Pouting quietly in her underwear. She had her run as a Transformers actress, but all that got her were some dismal reviews and Michael Bay giving Jason Statham a knowing smile every time they cross paths. No, sitting silently in her panties is the place for Rosie. When she’s good, she gets her favorite licorice treat. And when she’s bad, you buzz the invisible fence collar and she’s back to pouty and quiet. That’s how you sell some fucking underwear.
By Travis January 09, 2014 @ 12:00 PM
Of all of the celebrities that have been vacationing in fancy places like St. Barts and Los Cabos, none have been as wonderful and kind as model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, who has been spending the new year with her boyfriend, Jason Statham, in Hawaii. Unlike all of those other famous, wealthy dicks, Rosie has been documenting her entire trip on Instagram, and in between stupid pictures of trees and more trees, she’s been treating everyone to photos of her in bikinis. You know, most people try to leave their jobs at the office, but real heroes like Rosie? They never stop doing what they’re best at.
Unfortunately, her vacation is over, so we’ll just have to settle for all of the regular bikini and lingerie photos that she posts to her Instagram.
By Travis January 03, 2014 @ 12:00 PM
Actor Jason Statham and, much more importantly, his girlfriend and model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley are currently on vacation in Hawaii, and if you were worried that they were going to exclude us from the fun, don’t. Rosie has been posting photos from their vacation to Instagram, but instead of boring crap like pictures of them together, having fun, she’s been posting photos like the one above, because it’s very important to know how great her ass looks while standing on the beach in Hawaii. I can only imagine that her personal photo albums are more like strip tease flipbooks, so I’d appreciate the chance to further inspect them for the sake of being thorough in my research.