Jessica Alba Made Another Movie

By Lex August 20, 2014 @ 2:24 PM

Jaime King And Jessica Alba At The Premiere For 'Sin City- A Dame To Kill For' In Hollywood
Jessica Alba has been telling everybody who will listen and owns a ladies magazine that she’s finally become confident with her own sexuality. I too am finally confident with her sexuality. I bet the journey was more rigorous for her. In honor of our mutual desire to touch her repeatedly in her privates, I’m inviting a half-dozen Northeastern liberal arts college girls to watch the women in Sin City 2 portray empowered devious strippers who get beaten and screwed and maybe find strong men to stick up for them. We’ll all have a good laugh after the film as feminists draw me into the alley way for an emasculating assault.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet, Pacific Coast News, Getty

Eva Green’s Boobs Banned By the MPAA

By Lex May 30, 2014 @ 12:43 PM

Eva Green In A See Through Top For A Sin City 2 Poster
The MPAA ensured that our nation’s children will never be exposed to the horror of the female anatomy by banning the Sin City 2 posters featuring Eva Green in a thin robe that exhibited “curve of under breast and dark nipple/areola circle visible through sheer gown.” What the fuck, Sin City? Stick to your glorified cartoon images of senseless blood letting and maiming. Stop trying to turn our nation’s young boys into deranged tit lovers like the Greatest Generation or 9/11 firefighters or the last forty-three Presidents. The last thing we want is young men passing around photos of areola at school when they should be focused on their manifestos and murder-suicide days of retribution. Bless you, MPAA. You’re the guardians at the gate.

Photo Credit: Sin City 2