Maxim Finally Gets It Right

By Lex June 11, 2014 @ 12:10 PM

Candice Swanepoel Shows Her Midriff At Maxim's Hot 100 Women Of 2014 Celebration
Under new ownership, Maxim magazine continues its on-again off-again tradition of inviting really good looking foreign models to its Maxim Hot 100 celebration. Last year saw the Miley Cyrus incident that cost the waning periodical its nut sack in pride. They seem to have righted their ship this year by bringing out girls who have a better understanding of how to put on lipstick. These are the girls who were told as far back as they can remember how pretty they were, because they were, not because they had a kids TV show that was paying for all the Range Rovers in the family.

Photo Credit: Getty

Sophia Bush made a new friend

By brendon September 25, 2012 @ 3:46 PM

sophia_bush_says_hi_to_a_dog

Apparently someone needs to go back to guard dog school because that’s not Sophia Bush’s dog. She was leaving a gym in West Hollywood today and, according to the picture agency, “was excited to see a big dog and stopped to pet it.”

So she stepped up to a strange dog in a steel pinch collar (the universal sign for “mean dog”), grabbed it’s head, put her face an inch from his mouth and presumably started saying things like “Who’s a good boy!” in that cute dog voice girls use.

And that big moose just let her. If he was supposed to growl or something that went right out the window when the pretty girl started to rub his ears. She’d be a really good jewel thief/sexy cat burglar like in the movies.

(image source = fame/flynet)

HOLLYWOOD IS F’N WEIRD

By brendon January 22, 2007 @ 2:06 PM

Okay today is boring, so instead of calling Paris a whore (rightfully) for the one billionth time, here’s a synopsis of one of the weirdest Hollywood stories you’ll ever hear, wrapped up by the great website Hollywood Interrupted.  Basically the story is about the screenwriter who wrote "the Hitcher", who killed two people in a car crash, then got out and slit his own throat with a shard of glass.  The story actually gets weirder after that.  Hollywood Interrupted says:

In May 2000, screenwriter Eric Red was involved in a minor fender-bender on Wilshire in West Los Angeles … (Reds Jeep Cherokee hit a car in front of him) and when the guy in the car ahead walked back to (Reds Jeep), he saw Red slumped over the wheel, but staring straight ahead, his eyes open wide. Then the car started to move. Slowly, the Jeep pushed the other car out of the intersection until it jacknifed into oncoming traffic — his girlfriend screaming in the front seat all the while.  At the last second, Red's Jeep slipped off the back bumper and his tires found traction, jumpstarting him from 15 to 50 mph in a matter of seconds, and he crashed through a bus shelter, through the plate glass windows of a pool hall, and against the giant mahogany bar 20 feet inside, killing two people who were pinned against the bar and injuring 20. Then, when everyone was trying to rock the jeep back off his victims, Red wandered off, picked up a shard of glass, and slit his throat.
That's when the weird part really began. Red went immediately into the hospital on suicide watch, stayed out of the paper, and nine months later, LAPD announced they were dropping all charges — it turns out, due to a neurological condition which caused him to pass out at the wheel. That would have been the end of it, except that the family of one of the victims was all lawyers, and they pursued him through the courts for five years before winning a million-dollar judgment. But in a monumental bit of reporting, Cullum documents every twist and turn — including the similarities between the accident and his own films and unproduced screenplays, and the script he wrote after the fact making fun of the whole thing. It's not a tale for the faint-hearted.
And here's a tidbit you won't find in the story: When being admitted to UCLA hospital hours after the accident, Red insisted on being registered under the name Mario Kan. Mario Kan is an anagram for "I RAN AMOK."

This is why when I kill people, I register under the name "Don Peryi".  Which is an anagram for "Pony Ride".  Because everyone likes Pony Rides!  Weeee!!!