Jamie Foxx wants to be the Spider-Man 2 villian

By brendon November 01, 2012 @ 3:45 PM

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Jamie Foxx is sort of an asshole, but then again so am I and no even likes me. I’m annoying and that’s without anyone kissing my ass 24 hours a day. But, anyway, the point is that Variety says Sony is in talks with Foxx to play the villain in the sequel to ‘the Amazing Spider-Man’, and he sorta confirmed that on twitter today when he said he dressed up like Electro last night.

Hopefully he’s serious, and it was the first one, because that outfit is fucking ridiculous. It’s like someone you’d see on Nick Jr teaching kids about electricity. He might kill me but my last words would be, “Hahaha … that guy … is a pussy.”

Spider-Man less amazing now than the first 3 times

By brendon July 09, 2012 @ 1:16 PM

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‘The Amazing Spider-Man’ easily won the weekend box office (it helps to open Monday at midnight and have a 6-day opening “weekend”) earning $75 million in it’s first 3 days ($140M total), making it a huge success by any standard.

Unless your standard is the other Spider-Man movies, from the trilogy that ended just 5 years ago, because ‘Spider-Man‘ earned $115 million in it’s first 3 days. ‘Spider-Man 2‘ made $130 million, and ‘Spider-Man 3‘ topped them both with $151 million. The re-boot made $40M less than the lowest one, despite the advantage of higher ticket prices on 3D (which accounted for 44 percent of sales) and IMAX (which accounted for 10 percent).

But it still made tons of money so Sony doesn’t really give a shit if you saw it because you somehow don’t know the most famous origin story in all fiction or saw it because you’re just kind of obligated to see movies like this in the summer. I didn’t do either. You can’t just film the same fucking action with new people and expect me to watch it. Unless we’re talking about porn, in which case I totally will.

the new ‘Amazing Spider-Man’ trailer is here

By brendon February 07, 2012 @ 2:45 PM

At first the new Spider-Man reboot seemed like a dumb idea because it was gonna tell the origin story, exactly like the Spider-Man movie we already saw a few years ago, but this new one has promised “the untold story“, a today the new trailer clears a few things up.

In the first movie, a scientist that Peter Parker knows injects himself with an experimental drug and turns himself into a green monster that goes on a murderous rampage, while in this one, a scientist that Peter Parker knows injects himself with an experimental drug and turns himself into a green monster that goes on a murderous rampage.

Um, but also, the new villain has poor bathroom etiquette. The other movie never even mentioned that.

Sony is deceptive

By brendon December 14, 2011 @ 1:26 PM

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There’s a line where clever marketing becomes outright lying, and Sony ran right past it with their ‘Amazing Spider-Man’ poster. It’s insulting enough that they’re remaking the number 1 movie of 2002, but now they’re acting like they’re not. A few details got changed but it’s still the same story. That goes for Sony and for the prosecutor in my date rape case, who acts like I should be able to remember where every single pill went like I’m a fucking computer.

(image source of andrew garfield on set = pacific coast)

the Spider-Man trailer is officially online

By brendon July 20, 2011 @ 3:35 PM

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Some dickhead bloggers already ruined the surprise, but the teaser trailer for the Spider-Man reboot is officially online today, and while I still don’t understand why we have to once again sit through the origin story that everyone already knows (*), seeing the final 30 seconds, when it kicks into POV mode, in full screen 1080, it already looks better than anything in the previous 3 movies. Then again, those movies had Kirsten Dunst in them, so I could say the same thing about my toilet.

(*) this is exactly why David Fincher passed on directing the first ‘Spider-Man’ movie in 1999: “But I wasn’t interested in the genesis, I just couldn’t shoot somebody being bitten by a radioactive spider – just couldn’t sleep knowing I’d done that.” Oh, but I think the article is mistaken and Wes Bentley from ‘American Beauty’ was his choice to play Peter Parker, not Ed Norton. This was really fascinating, wasn’t it?

the Spiderman teaser is kind of badass

By brendon July 19, 2011 @ 10:02 AM

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Hopefully this isn’t one of those trailers that studios made exclusively for the big San Diego Comic-Con, which starts tomorrow night, because the teaser for Sony’s Spiderman reboot is pretty god damn cool. Actually it’s boring and repetitive and monotonous because we’ve already seen this stupid origin story, and this is a leaked bootleg copy so the quality is horrible, BUT THEN it gets pretty god damn cool when it kicks in to POV mode. This is the most fun you can have with any POV video that doesn’t involve Asa Akira opening her mouth.

CONFUSING UPDATE – ok, I’ll never understand this but Sony is making me take the video down, even though it makes the movie look surprisingly good and that’s the point of a trailer. So sorry if you missed it. Spiderman is now a dog, by the way. That’s one of the new things they explain in the trailer.