Suge Knight Counts on Mayweather (VIDEO)

Suge Knight remains behind bars awaiting his murder trial for plowing his truck into two dudes who looked at him squirrelly. His attorney claims that Knight's good buddy Floyd Mayweather is coming to post Knight's $10 million bail after Saturday's fight, First thing's first on the to-do list. Beat Pacquiao. Bail out Suge. Kight's lawyer went on to say that his trial defense will consist of telling the jury that the...read more

Down Goes Frazier

Suge Knight finally stopped complaining about feeling feint in his court appearances today and actually went and feinted. A full collapse to the ground right after the judge accepted the prosecutor's recommendation to set bail at $25 million in Knight's ongoing running people over to death with a truck legal imbroglio. Seeing a large grown man fall to the floor can be disconcerting, until you realized how many times...read more

Suge Knight Yearns to Be Free

Suge Knight's lawyer says he is not a flight risk and should be allowed to chill at home and make Nestle Toll House cookiesduring the period leading up to his murder trial. Knight would be willing to wear an electronic monitoring bracelet and also have his leg amputated or hold his case worker hostage. He would also willingly allow dozens of his sketchy career criminal friends to smuggle him Tracfones ideal for...read more

Suge Knight Living On A Prayer

Suge Knight is claiming self-defense in his murder trial where he purposefully slammed his truck at speed into a mortal human being. Footage of the event shows a guy apparently attacking Knight through the window so Knight high tails it in reverse and knocks the guy to the ground. At this fork in the road, Knight has two clear choices: put the car in drive and fleeor put the car in drive and run over the attacker's...read more

Suge Knight Ailing

Suge Knight told a judge he is going blind in prison because he doesn't have access to propermedical care. He was taken to a hospital where he pocketed six scalpels and an elderly Jewish attorney from dialysis. Knight was previously hospitalized after having a panic attack, which is weird because the only treatment for a panic attack is to drink a bottle of Makers or not be in prison and neither of those things you...read more

Suge Knight Might've Just Killed Somebody

As somebody who almost took a journalism class once, I have to consider running with a story that Suge Knight just killed a dude in Compton. It certainly rings true, but is it really news? Suge Knight murders Hmong family of seven? Maybe. Ifhe used hispinky fingers to finish off the babies. Angrily leaving the scene of an altercation and backing his car over a bystander? That won't even make his dear diary entry for...read more

Suge Knight Takes A Tumble

Suge Knight passed out and fell down twice while in jail causing injury to himself because his head is giant and weighted down with thoughts of revenge. Knight is either unable to come up with $75,000 dollars in bail for his recent paparazzi camera stealing arrest or just wants you to think that so he can shank some inmate who didn't cover the spread in Super Bowl XXVI. After being shot again at Chris Brown's MTV...read more

Suge Knight And Katt Williams Partners In Crime

Suge Knight and Katt Williams stole a female paparazzi's camera in Beverly Hills because they are working on their Guinness Record rap sheet stats. It seems like taking a camera when it's pointed in your face by a chick in recovery should have a legal exemption. Not the case, it's still stealing. Knight was arrested in Vegas while Williams was arrested in court where he was already appearing for a separate charge and...read more

Suge Knight Could Go Out With A Bang

Questionable sources claim Suge Knight may have been shot because he was seeking a tell all book deal. Knight apparently scored an advance for a similar book years ago but realized he would have to pull a drive by on his own home were it ever published. He never wrote the memoir but kept the publishing advance because fuck your credit score when you get shot at thrice yearly. "[Suge Knight's book would] chronicle the...read more

Suge Knight Takes All The Bullets, Chris Brown Gets None

According to Chris Brown's posse and a number of really stupid hot models, a trained killeropened fire at Brown during his pre-VMA party at the 1OAK Nightclub in L.A.. Brown employed his extraordinary dancing skills to narrowly avoid the bullets which subsequently hit Suge Knight who is too fat to dance. Even though Brown escaped any injuries, his polite social circle were quick to insist the shots were meant for...read more