Taylor Momsen is backsliding. A couple years ago she was flashing her duct tape covered tits in hot club venues across Europe, just barely eighteen, drinking, smoking, fondling other chicks onstage. She was looking like the poster child for fun shit you can do instead of going to college. Now Cindy Lou Who is barely flashing her midsection at a gig in Ft. Lauderdale. Soon it will be showing off her varicose vein scars at Bar Mitzvahs. You can’t work backwards on the naughty scale. Anything Farrah Abraham ever does onscreen without a dick in her butt will be boring. So too is Taylor Momsen being PG-rated on stage. Talk to the hand, Taylor, it’s very disappointed.
I was always partial to the Goth chicks back in high school. It was easy to pretend that they looked good behind all that dramatic makeup and if you were willing to whisper shit like, ‘I bet your parents would hate me,’ you had a pretty good shot at getting lucky. But after high school the whole Goth thing seemed kind of tired. Back a couple or three years when Taylor Momsen was the world’s most rebellious teenager, her whole dark brooding spoiled suburban girl thing totally worked. But now a couple months away from twenty, nobody wants to hear about how not getting a Beemer for your sweet sixteen is why you’ll always be the Woman in Black. Even the Dark Lord grows weary of your long face. So wipe off a pound of that makeup and maybe show us your tits? It’s time to enter the circle of adults.
According to Taylor Momsen, Taylor Momsen is naked in this spoken word video for ‘Under the Water’ by the Pretty Reckless, but it’s on youtube so how naked could she really be.
Just skip to the very end; she looks more like one of those androgynous figures in a Marilyn Manson video or a picture that your friend would send you asking “would you hit it” but it’s a trick and the girl is actually a tranny because your friend wants to call you a fag.
‘Gossip Girl’ star Taylor Momsen, who is 17 by the way, certainly was a busy little bee this weekend. First she performed at the Heineken Festival in Venice on Friday, then at a club in Amsterdam on Saturday, then at the Download Festival in England yesterday. None of which I would care about except she did it in nipple tape and then a flimsy dress and then nipple tape again. People criticize sluts but by golly, when they want attention they get results.
Taylor Momsen put on her designer tough girl outfit and hit some clubs in New York last night, or at least she would have if it didn’t take 15 hours to put on those ridiculous boots. So instead she got some coffee and pouted in the sunshine.
Justin Bieber is the biggest star on earth right now if you’re under 12 or creepy, and last night was the LA premiere of his movie Never Say Never. And for some reason Taylor Momsen of Gossip Girl took that to mean she should go to the Generic Slut Store for a “sexy” outfit to wear.
Hopefully this will get her the attention she so desperately craves. If not this maybe she could put her hands in gloves that are on fire and wave em around, or put a speculum in and call that an outfit.