JESSICA SIMPSON – is in talks with NBC for a sitcom that “would feature Simpson playing a version of herself in a Curb Your Enthusiasm-style look at her life”. And it can’t possibly fail because improv is the perfect vehicle for this quick-witted legend of comedy. (tv guide)
RUSSELL CROWE – might be dating “burlesque goddess” Dita Von Teese, who has somehow totally escaped her past as a “spread-eagle girl having sex with a popsicle goddess”. For the record, it might not be the best idea in the world for a guy with his temper to date a girl who is super super pale.(page six)
BEN AFFLECK – will have a tough time winning the Oscar for Best Picture even though his movie ‘Argo’ just won the Golden Globe for Best Picture. His best bet is for lots of old voters to think they’re voting for ‘Fargo’. (huff post)
TAYLOR SWIFT – has a crush on Bradley Cooper, so she had Jennifer Lawrence ask Bradley if he wanted to go out with her. The response: “Bradley has absolutely no intention of getting together with Taylor.” So then Taylor asked, “What does he mean ‘no intention‘? So he really wants to date me but thinks you can’t plan love? Oh my gaad, why do guys always have to play these games, why can’t they just be honest!” (radar)
MICHELLE KEEGAN – is an English actress in the new issue of Zoo, and she’s in a bikini but who cares about that? What I wanna know is if her eyes are the same size, and what insect does her eyebrow look like? This magazine is really out of touch.
Taylor Swift doesn’t only act like a petulant 15-year-old when writing songs, she does it when losing awards too, as you can see by her pouty smirk at the Golden Globes last night after her awful song for ‘the Hunger Games’ rightfully lost to Adeles much better song for ‘Skyfall’.
And as if that wasn’t bad enough, Adele piled on the disrespect like it was a topping at an ice cream bar by acting amazed and saying she had no idea she was gonna win. THAT’S TAYLORS GIMMICK! How dare this fat bitch steal from poor sweet wittle Taylor!
This should have been obvious based on nothing but the awful, frumpy bikinis she always wears, but Taylor Swift is a boring prude. Seriously. Just look at that god damn picture. What’s drier, the sand or her vagina?
That was rhetorical but I bet Harry Styles of ‘One Direction’ would know, because that’s reportedly why he broke up with her.
(Styles) dumped Taylor Swift after growing tired of her “asexual” ways, Radar.com says.
“Taylor is so concerned that the public will think she’s a wh*re because she dates around, that she doesn’t put out. What she doesn’t get is that the guys keep dumping her because she’s being a prude.”
The good news for Taylor is that there are lots of guys who would love to spend the night with a pale and bony stiff who just lies there in bed. The bad news is that they’re necrophiliacs.
If for some reason you absolutely have to date Taylor Swift, the smart thing to do is to get in and get out as fast as possible, before she has time to think of words that rhyme with your name. So that’s what One Direction singer Harry Styles, who is 18, has now done after dating Taylor, who is 23, for less than two months.
It was a good move on his part. There are only two types of girls who hang around with boys that are 5 years younger than them. Lunatics and babysitters.
Taylor Swifts wormy looking poser boyfriend Harry Styles slept over at her house last night, but then took off when her mom showed up. Too bad he isn’t dating Lindsay. This would have pretty much been the plot of a porn movie.
The Grammy Nominations Concert is apparently a thing that exists, and it was last night in Nashville, hosted by Taylor Swift and LL Cool J, and it’s so cute the way the cunty, 22-year-old millionaire acts as if she’s just some awkward geeky teen while 10,000 people applaud her for it. It’s so adorable and endearing, I could just watch it all day.