20-year-old Taylor Swift went to the beach at Atlantis in the Bahamas over the weekend, and I don’t know if she’s incontinent or what but she wore this giant bikini. This shit wouldn’t have even been sexy in the 40’s. It’s the kind of bikini you’d see painted on a WWII bomber but then at least the girl would have had huge tits. Her next record should be with a barbershop quartet, her and three guys in striped shirts and straw hats. Oh, I know, I’m gettin all turned on too.
(source = splash news online)
By brendon December 29, 2009 @ 3:36 PM
Taylor Swift and ‘Twilight’ star Taylor Lautner have broken up after quietly dating for the past 3 months. Prepare to get a toothache from all the adorable sweetness. Us magazine says…
The pair first sparked rumors of a romance when she hugged him at her October 9 concert.
They have since been spotted on several wholesome dates, like their frozen yogurt date at Menchie’s alongside Swift’s mom earlier this month.
“He liked her more than she liked him,” the source tells Us. “He went everywhere he could to see her, but she didn’t travel much to see him.”
What the hell was that? Hugs and frozen yogurt? These two have a lot to learn about being big Hollywood stars. If I were him I’d have hit her with my car, and I’d buy a new tophat every day, then just throw it away. Look at me everyone, I’m rich, new tophats are nothing to me!
By brendon December 10, 2009 @ 3:22 PM
Taylor Swift showed off her new straight hair last night in New York when she went out with actress Emma Stone, and overall it was fantastic (even though here she looks like a female impersonator). The only problem is her stupid outfit. If she wants to stay famous she needs to focus on excuses to bend over things while wearing clothing that is either way too loose or way too tight. When you’re 19 and skinny and as hot as she is, subtlety is the enemy, and needs to be treated as such.
(source = inf daily)
By brendon November 12, 2009 @ 11:48 AM
Taylor Swift is probably too sweet to realize how it would look when paparazzi had her kiss the very phallic statue last night after the CMA awards, but she probably doesn’t care considering she just went beast mode and won every award in sight. Still only 19-years-old, she won all 4 awards she was nominated for, but the headline was when she became the youngest person to ever win Entertainer of the Year (the biggest award) and the first female to take it since Shania Twain in 1999.
“I’ll never forget this moment because in this moment everything that I have ever wanted has just happened to me,” Swift said through tears as she accepted the association’s highest honour during ceremonies at Sommet Center.
The 19-year-old crossover sensation beat the biggest names in country and snapped Kenny Chesney’s stranglehold on the category: He won three straight and four of the last five. She also ended Carrie Underwood’s three-year dominance in the female vocalist category.
Chesney hugged and kissed Swift on the cheek, then whispered a message in her ear before she received the trophy. She called her band on stage and was the centre of a group hug as fans cheered wildly, holding signs that said, “We love you, Taylor”; her father cried in the audience.
“Every single person in that category let me open up for them this year,” Swift said. “Thank you all so much. I love you.”
I couldn’t even afford a soft taco when I was 19, so I’m tempted to tell Taylor to kiss my ass, but gratitude is an incredibly endearing quality and she seems nice and she writes all her own songs so it’s hard to resent her. I could have been rich and famous at 19 too, except my only noticeable talent was right-clicking pictures of underage girls and naked models and then masturbating. I went down to the French Quarter where the street performers hang out and did my act for tips, but it wasn’t really the money making extravaganza I had hoped for.
(story source = the ap. picture source = getty images)
By brendon November 03, 2009 @ 7:01 PM
TAYLOR SWIFT AND KANYE WEST – are an awesome costume that I bet more people wish they had thought of. And yes we were supposed to be done with Halloween pictures but I didn’t count on finding this one. Or this one of a ridiculously hot girl dressed as a Playboy bunny. Know what else I didn’t count on? Falling in love. (college humor)
RIHANNA – says she was humiliated when the picture of her with cuts and bruises on her face after being beaten by Chris Brown leaked online. Which is silly because that’s not her fault, and it let everyone know what a punk Chris Brown really is. Wearing those big dumb hoop earrings however is her fault, and she needs to knock that shit off. (abc news)
SEAN PENN – is the father of 16-year-old Hopper Penn, who was arrested at his Malibu school last week. Because Hooper is a minor police won’t say what he did. So let’s start telling people he joined al qaeda. “Hey did you hear Sean Penns son is in al qaeda? Oh I know! What a piece of shit that punk is. Let’s go throw rocks and bottles at his dad!” (wonderwall)
MARIAH CAREY – almost fell down as she walked out as a guest on the Jay Leno show yesterday. But then she didn’t, as you can see in this video. I’ve never seen such agility. She’s like a gazelle. (popeater)
By brendon October 29, 2009 @ 10:02 AM
When Taylor Swift was at Katy Perrys birthday paint party over the weekend, one picture showed some random guy behind her with a swastika on his shirt (here). It seemed likely this was some jackass and the fact that they were photographed together was just unfortunate timing for Taylor and her good girl image.
But now someone claiming to be the guy in the picture is on a message board (here) saying he’s Taylors new boyfriend, and he’s posting the picture you see above as some kind of proof
I judge people by the way they look (Asian girls are sexual deviants, black guys can get you weed, etc.) and this guy looks Jewish, so I’ve decided he’s Jewish and therefore is just some nerd who does stuff like this for attention. But why Taylor would pose for pictures with him is the real question. She’s supposed to be a force for good, and considering she looks like a walking recruitment poster for Nazi Youth and the Aryan ideal, it’s hard to believe she would smile and pose next to a swastika. I’m not gonna lie to you, I’ve seen better ideas.