rachel uchitel is a heartbreaker

By brendon December 10, 2009 @ 5:20 PM


Elin Nordegrens nemesis Rachel Uchitel worked out this morning in New York, and I just can’t find it in me to stay mad at her. How can you not love her? She’s a successful business woman, she’s slutty, she’s tan, and she got implants that would look huge even if they were put into a girl 40 feet tall.

But I’m not the only one smitten, at least according to this email that MSNBC says Tiger wrote to her.

“I don’t know if this is going to work. I thought I was getting to know you, but it feels like I’m just another person who happens to be famous. Every time I think about it, I get a lump in my throat. … I don’t know what person I was falling for so hard. The one I got to know on the phone, e-mail, text and in person. Or the one who likes famous people. I am so confused, because what my brain is saying and what my heart is saying are two different things. … It guts me to think I’ve fallen for the wrong one.”

It takes some balls to write a letter guilt tripping your side piece for not being committed to your adulterous relationship. This guy is either a complete pussy, or everything I’ve ever wanted to be, I still can’t tell which.

(image source = splash news online and wenn)

tiger woods is a sociopath

By brendon December 10, 2009 @ 1:14 PM


Lingerie model Jamie Jungers is the third girl, at least, that Tiger Woods started sleeping with while still in the first year of his marriage. Last night she talked to the Sun (the newspaper, not the yellow dwarf main sequence star) and confessed that during their 18-month affair, she and Tiger would have sex in his house and even in the bed that he shared with his wife.

Jamie said they began their secret affair in June 2005, after Tiger introduced himself in a club at the exclusive Bellagio Hotel in Las Vegas.
Within hours he wooed Jamie back to his hotel room for sex.
It came just eight months after he wed Swede Elin Nordegren.
Weeks later, Tiger invited her to his family home near Newport Beach, California.
By this time, Jamie had strong feelings for the golfer – and seeing pictures around the house of him with Elin made her unhappy.
She said: “It was heartbreaking. I imagined how she would feel if she knew I was in her house.”
“Later I said to him, ‘I don’t know a whole lot about your marriage situation. I know it is very fresh. I know you just got married. I mean, is it going OK?’ He said, ‘Yes, it’s fine, she’s in Sweden with her family’.”

I’m not a professional detective, but when the girl he was sleeping with asked if his marriage was okay, I don’t think the answer she was looking for was, “yeah she’s in Sweden”. I think she meant something else.

I told Tiger about my theory and he said, “Oh, you mean like longitude and latitude? Is that what she wanted? Or just a specific city, and how many hours it would take for my wife to get from there to this pile of whores I have on our bed. Because I made a chart for that.”

tiger has been cheating the enitire time

By brendon December 09, 2009 @ 8:34 PM


Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren were married on October 5, 2004, which is relevant because forums on the golf website 4gea.com have a post written on August 31, 2005, and according to that Tiger was cheating on his wife less than a year into his marriage.

Okay, let me preface this by saying that I have no proof of what I am about to say. Therefore I cannot guarantee the accuracy of these claims.  I am simply going to relay a story that was told to me last night.
My buddy’s girlfriend told me that her best friend just had an affair with Tiger this past weekend in Las Vegas. She was in the VIP section of Light ( a very exclusive club inside the Bellagio) when one of Tiger’s bodyguards asked her to come meet Tiger. She went over and sat with him, had a few drinks, then left through the back door. Got in Tiger’s limo, and he took her back to his exclusive room behind the MGM Grand.
Now I do know this girl and she is very attractive but not quite on the same level as Elin :-) I do not like spreading rumors like this but I’m fascinated by this story for some reason. I would never think of Tiger as the cheating type, especially since he is still a newlywed. She is a nice, normal girl from what I can tell and this is a pretty outlandish story to make up out of the clear blue sky.

Being famous must be awesome. Tiger is a damn nerd. If he weren’t rich, he would have to see a girl he likes then break into her house when she’s gone and find out what kind of things she likes and dislikes and then set up a bunch of amazing coincidences. Another good tip is to try and get them on a boat for some reason.

holly sampson on may 26th: “i f*cked tiger woods.”

By brendon December 09, 2009 @ 6:16 PM

Back in May, porn star and Tiger Woods side piece Holly Sampson did an internet interview, and you can forget about any coy allusions to sex with this one, because when asked if she’d ever had sex with someone famous, she just blurted Tigers name right out. Sports By Brooks says…

“I f—– Tiger Woods. … Me and my girlfriends did a bachelor party for Tiger and it was amazing. And then he picked me to go in the room. I have to say he was really good.”
“I think it’s pretty amazing. He’s like the whitest black boy you’ve ever met. His teeth are perfect and he’s the perfect gentleman. He’s beautiful.”

Sampson also confirmed performing oral sex on Woods and that he used a condom.
“It was pretty simple, straight up sex. He’s got a lot to protect himself from too. I think he would probably die if he knew I was telling this on the internet but that’s okay, I don’t care. It was fun, it’s not like it was any big mystery.”

She was so cavalier about the whole thing, she even mentions Kevin Costner first, then Tiger.  For his sake, I hope she did it with Costner just minutes earlier, because otherwise Tiger came in a distant second. Even being at the same party as Kevin Costner would be embarrassing, much less when that party is in some porn stars vagina. Tiger should pray his house falls down on top of him tonight before this gets any more embarrassing.

(WARNING – the video above has very NSFW language.  better copy of the video on Naughty Americas website)

tiger woods may have secret kids and a sex tape

By brendon December 09, 2009 @ 5:05 PM


Last week the National Enquirer broke the story that Tiger Woods was cheating on his wife which began the sex scandal that has dominated headlines ever since.  So it can’t be good when they’re the ones saying that the worst has yet to come.

A disgraced Tiger Woods is terrified that he fathered love children with his mistresses! And his many liaisons may have been caught on tape!
Woods had wild unprotected sex with a string of mistresses. “There is definitely more than one woman out there who could come forward to say she had his babies.”
To make matters even worse, (he) is reportedly worried that a lurid sex tape could appear.
(A number) of women have been identified as his lovers.
Among the places they claim to have had sex with the sports superstar are his Florida mansion and a series of hotels – all places that have security cameras.

I guess in hindsight that was all just random conjecture, wasn’t it? While it’s true that hotels do have security cameras, they rarely have them in the bedrooms or above the shower with the guest. So that leaves only the main hotel, and it seems like if Tiger was jacking off on a girl while she got on her knees at the front desk or on the diving board, we would have heard about it by now.

(story source = the enquirer.  image source for pix of tiger whore jamie grubbs yesterday in LA = splash news online)

you have got to be god damn kidding me

By brendon December 08, 2009 @ 7:45 PM


If you spent most of your adult life carefully cultivating a respectable, almost antiseptic, reputation like Tiger Woods has, there would only be one thing worse than cheating on your beautiful wife with some dirty porn star. And that would be cheating on your beautiful wife with two dirty porn stars. Deadspin says…

(Tigers other girlfriends) annoyed the crap out one of Tiger’s mistresses — a person who actually considered herself a “full-time” of Tiger’s thanks to years of faithful service to his virulent sexual appetite. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Veronica Siwik-Daniels aka Joslyn James, a double-D brunette whose specialties include being double-penetrated on camera in many NSFW films.
(A) Facebook friend of Miss Siwik-Daniels, said that this status update she posted on Dec. 2 was meant for all the ladies running their mouth about her man, Eldrick.
“I find it comical when certain individuals have no life of their own and want to be ME…so terribly bad. LMAO!”
The emphasis on “ME” was Veronica’s way of respecting her unique relationship with Tiger and not becoming part of the screeching hordes.

This guy is a fuckin weirdo. There are some insanely good looking porn stars these days, like Tori Black and Asa Akira, but Tiger wants none of that. If Joslyn James came up to me in a bar, my first question wouldn’t be, “Will you have sex with me”, it would be, “So how long have you been a woman?”