The Aussie version of MSN says today that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes want to do a sexy - and naked - photoshoot together much like the one David and Victoria Beckham did last month for W magazine. MSN says:
Sources say a racy photo shoot will allow the pair to show off a side of their relationship that's rarely seen, with insiders explaining that while they've so far kept their public image family oriented, Katie, 28, and her husband have a strong physical side they want share with fans.
"Tom and Katie really have amazing chemistry," says a pal. "They want to show the world how much."
While the finer details are yet to be confirmed, insiders say they'd like at least one photo to feature them naked.
"They are already planning the various photos," says a source close to the pair. "Tom and Katie want to pose together in the shower, dripping wet and covered by nothing but steam."
Eh. That's gross. I'm not saying I don't wanna see Katie Holmes naked, because, in reality, I would very much like to see Katie Holmes naked, but not if I have to see Tom Cruise too. And I think if a kid were masturbating to those and accidentally finished on Tom instead of Katie, that would mean he's gay now. He's gay and he's into dudes. I'm pretty accurate with my semen - in fact I practice by shooting tin cans off a fence like cowboys - but this one just isn't worth the risk.
Naysayers may be resistant to accept Tom Cruise in his new role as the German general who attempted to assassinate Hitler, but as this picture proves, he can hold a briefcase on a runway and look tubby right up there with some of the best actors who ever lived. (full picture here)
Someone needs to kidnap Suri and run a CAT scan on her immediately because something is wrong with her. I don't know what, but she's clearly f'd up somehow. She always looks like they just pulled her out of the dryer. Katie looks like a hot zombie, there's no way her daughter should look like they just hit her in the head with a frying pan.
The super muscular dog isn't relevant to anything, in case you were wondering, except that he was in the Daily Mail today too and he's a mutant just like Suri. That's pretty much like what I would look like if I was a dog, except with piercing blue eyes and getting smooches from a hot girl dog.
Monday, wire reports said that the World War II movie "Valkyrie" would not be allowed to film on German military sites because its star, Tom Cruise, is a scientologist. Now the German government has reconsidered, deciding that the story of high ranking German officers attempting to assassinate Adolph Hitler was important because it's a rare positive portrayal of Germans during the war. ABC.com says:
The German ministry now says that, while it hasn't received an official request from "Valkyrie" producers to shoot in the country, it would "look agreeably" upon any such application.
The source of the "Valkyrie" controversy seems to have stemmed from a posting on the Web site of conservative German member of parliament Antje Blumenthal. Blumenthal posted a statement Friday claiming that Defense Minister Franz-Josef Jung had pledged to her that Cruise would not get permission to shoot because of the purported danger posed by his Scientology.
"Valkyrie" is being praised as one of the "too few examples of military opposition to Hitler's regime."
"The assassination attempt against Hitler is hardly known outside Germany," Fisser said. "We should therefore be delighted and welcome this wonderful opportunity to improve the image of our country."
God damit, you already had improved the image of your country by yelling at sceintology. If you think Tom Cruise playing one of you is gonna help your image, you're screwed. You might as well get OJ or a talking gun.
Wire reports today say that Germany will not allow a movie starring Tom Cruise to film at German military sites because Cruise is a Scientologist. Reuters says:
Cruise, also one of the film's producers, is a member of the Church of Scientology which the German government does not recognize as a church. Berlin says it masquerades as a religion to make money, a charge Scientology leaders reject.
Cruise has been cast as Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, leader of the unsuccessful attempt to assassinate the Nazi dictator in July 1944 with a bomb hidden in a briefcase.
Defense Ministry spokesman Harald Kammerbauer said the film makers "will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult".
I wish the US would stand up to the these crazy whores like the Germans do. What the hell are they gonna do? It's a religion based on spaceships. The worst that can happen is that Cruise will pray to his outer space puma or whatever it is they believe in and then that thing from Lilo and Stich will come to earth, play records and go surfing. I'm willing to take my chances.
The Sun UK says that Katie Holmes is pregnant for the second time. No word yet on who the father might be (zing!). The Sun says:
Holmes told close pals she is thrilled. But she tried to hide her bump under a loose dress as she and Tom celebrated with their pals THE BECKHAMS in Madrid. But tactile Tom, 44, gave the game away by paying more attention to Katie, 28, than the action on the pitch.
A source said: “Katie and Tom are thrilled about having another baby on the way. She is glowing with happiness.”
Everything these people do is fascinating because their life is run by a religion based on UFO souls trapped on tropical islands. I might actually switch to Scientology because tropical islands are pretty, and maybe my new UFO god would invite me to hang out. The only down side would be if I saw my new god get bonked on the head with a coconut or step on a jellyfish. I'm not sure my faith could handle watching my god spaz out.
