10.18.2011 ‘Transformers’ 4 and 5 might star Jason Statham

Ehren Kruger is a pretty shitty writer, so this seems hard to believe but apparently he has an idea so amazing that Paramount might film ‘Transformers’ 4 and 5 back-to-back, maybe even with Michael Bay directing them again despite earlier saying he was done with the franchise.

Even more surprising is the possibility of Jason Statham as the new lead. This would be bad news for the Decipticons, who keep in mind were 0-3 even when the Autobots were led by that nebbish little Jew.

(source = latino review)

07.07.2011 Megan Fox is box office gold

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‘Transformers: Dark of the Moon’, has been out for 8 full days now, and it’s still doing incredible business, unless of course you compare it to ‘Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen’. At this point, ‘Fallen’ had made $239 million at the box office, while ‘Dark of the Moon’ now sits at $198. That’s a drop of around $41 million.

It would be overly simplistic to say this is all because Megan Fox was replaced by Rosie Huntington Whitely, but complicated theories are for fags, so that’s what I’m going to say.

Not only is Fox (seen here in her brand new Armani campaign) a thousand times hotter than Whitely, but now we’re expected to believe Sam Witwicky has dated two international supermodels in a row, which is somehow the dumbest premise even in a movie about fights between shape-shifting robots from outer space.


06.30.2011 ‘Transformers 3′ is down 40 percent from ‘2′

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No doubt fueled by it’s juvenile cheap shots at Megan Fox (like Shia telling his parents he “moved on to something better” or one of the robots saying his last girlfriend was “mean”), ‘Transformers 3’ had the biggest opening day of 2011 and is doing incredibly well by any definition.

Unless you compare it to the opening day for ‘Transformers 2’, the one with Megan Fox, in which case it’s an embarrassing failure.

E! cites this list of the all time opening days on Box Office Mojo and says

In its first full day in theaters, Transformers: Dark of the Moon grossed an estimated $37.3 million, good for sixth place on the list of all-time Wednesday openers.
But as you’ll notice, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is in second place, with a far bigger, far fatter $62 million debut.

And that’s despite the fact that 60 percent of ticket sales were for 3D, where average ticket prices are $10.85 and $14.85 for IMAX, as compared to the $7.50 they paid to see the second one.

It’s also despite the fact that ‘Dark of the Moon’ is actually pretty good. I’m as amazed as anyone but I liked it. The good news is they can still match the weekend total for ‘Revenge of the Fallen’, as long as they consider a weekend to be 17 days long.

(image source = splash)


06.28.2011 Shia LaBeouf claims he f**ked Megan Fox

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Shia LaBeouf has an interview in the new issue of Details, and it’s a revelation for no other reason than I had no idea that Details magazine still exists. But it does apparently, and they asked Shia if he and Megan Fox ever did it while filming the first two ‘Transformers’ movies.

Details says…

Asked if he hooked up with Fox, LaBeouf nods affirmatively. “Look, you’re on the set for six months, with someone who’s rooting to be attracted to you, and you’re rooting to be attracted to them,” he explains. “I never understood the separation of work and life in that situation. But the time I spent with Megan was our own thing, and I think you can see the chemistry onscreen.” When I inquire about Fox’s status at the time with her longtime boyfriend, Brian Austin Green, LaBeouf replies, “I don’t know, man. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. . . .”—repeating the phrase exactly 12 times with various intonations, as if trying to get it just right. Finally, he says, “It was what it was.”

This might seem somewhat plausible because Megan married Brian Austin Green, so it’s not like she’s all that selective, but I don’t believe him because she’s been famous for a long time and you almost never hear any stories about her sleeping around. And also the idea of fucking Megan Fox is so wonderful I can’t believe that anyone gets to do it, much less this doofus. It’s like hearing someone claim they can fly.

(image source of Shia his girlfriend Karolyn Pho last week = fame)


06.20.2011 oh f**k you, Steven Spielberg

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Back in 2009, Megan Fox did an interview with Wonderland magazine, who asked her what it was like to work with Michael Bay on the first 2 ‘Transformers’ movies. And she said…

“He’s like Napoleon and he wants to create this insane, infamous mad-man reputation. He wants to be like Hitler on his sets, and he is. So he’s a nightmare to work for but when you get him away from set, and he’s not in director mode, I kind of really enjoy his personality because he’s so awkward, so hopelessly awkward. He has no social skills at all. And it’s endearing to watch him.”

In other words Bay, like many directors, acted like a dictator on set but she liked him. Shortly after that, of course, Fox was replaced in ‘Transformers 3′, but not by Bay as it turns out. By Executive Producer Steven Spielberg.

Steven Spielberg demanded Megan Fox be fired from the latest Transformers film after she insulted its director, it has been revealed.
The Hollywood legend was outraged after the screen beauty compared Michael Bay to Hitler during a press interview.
Bay has revealed for the first time he was told to get rid of the actress.
He said: ‘You know the Hitler thing. Steven (Spielberg) said, fire her right now.’

For no reason other than ‘Indiana Jones 4′, Steven Speilberg can suck my dick, but the reality is he hasn’t made a good movie since ‘Saving Private Ryan’ 13 years ago and the most innovative thing he’s done since is set the record for the most product placement. It wasn’t just Matt and Trey who pointed out what a hack he is now, the creator of ‘Community’ called him a “moron” too.

And he is. He sucks. All he does is find ways to cast Shia LaBeouf (6 times in 5 years; in Disturbia, Eagle Eye, Indiana Jones 4 and Transformers 1, 2, and 3) and cash in on incoherent shit like ‘Transformers’. The first two were unbearable, even with Megan to stare at, and I’ll keep a cyanide capsule in my mouth just in case someone tries to trick me into seeing the third one.

(image source for Megan Fox in a bikini, day 2 = splash)


07.13.2010 tuesday morning headlines

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MEL GIBSON - stars in the movie ‘The Beaver’, directed by Jodie Foster, which was supposed to be released in September. Now Foster and the studio don’t know what to do with it. I asked Gibson what he told Foster as far as an apology, and this (NSFW language) is what he told her, but that’s pretty much his answer to everything. (e online)

TRANSFORMERS 3 - is currently filming in Chicago, and new set pics reveal that there are now NASCAR Transformers too. Not for marketing purposes, just because it makes a lot of sense to hide as the most conspicuous cars on earth. (jalopnik)

PREDATORS - is getting tremendous reviews and positive word of mouth, but some fans are annoyed because this iconic shot from the trailer is not actually in the movie. In the movie, Adrien Brody is only hit by one Predator laser. Why would fans complain about this? Because their lives are fantastic. (io9)

OPIE - of the Opie and Anthony show broke the story that New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner died today, according to his exclusive MLB sources. They were the first news outlet to report this, breaking the story on air around 8:30am, while CNN picked up the story almost 90 minutes later. After that they laughed at a dancing retarded girl, though CNN has yet to confirm that story. (twitter)

SOFIA VERGARA - had too many awesome bikini pictures yesterday to put in one post, so here are some more. Also continued from yesterday: my erection that’s hard enough to chop firewood. (splash news online)