Vanessa Hudgens is the only one

By brendon August 11, 2010 @ 1:52 PM

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On Monday I was whining because Jessica Alba, Megan Fox, Scarlett Johannson and others used to make every days pictures a sexy journey of erotic delights, where desire leads to obsession, and obsession leads to madness. I said that wave has pretty much come and gone and no hot new bitch had replaced any of them. But then a few emails suggested Vanessa Hudgens, and luckily they were right.

Right on cue, here she is leaving a gym yesterday with no bra. This bitch is sexy, and she has really pretty skin. I bet she’d be really flattered to know that if I were a serial killer, she’d be my first choice to skin and make a dress out of. Oh that’s right, Vanessa. Number 1.

Vanessa Hudgens makes ‘Rent’ worth watching

By brendon August 10, 2010 @ 6:00 PM

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Pulitzer and 4-time Tony winning play ‘Rent’ began a run this week in LA at the Hollywood Bowl, directed by the annoyingly versatile Neil Patrick Harris and starring Nicole Scherzinger, Wayne Brady, and a guy who looks like Jermaine O’Neal back when he played for the Pacers. But the real star is Vanessa Hudgens and her ass.

Not only does she look great (holyfuckingshit) but she’s getting good reviews. Variety wrote, “Vanessa Hudgens gains points for holding nothing back in her high-octane singing and erotic dancing ordinarily not seen outside the confines of a gentlemen’s club.” And the LA Times said, “there’s no telling how good she might be on stage with more experience.”

My goodness, who would have thought Vanessa was gonna be the real thing? Me, that’s who. That’s why the Vanessa sex doll I made has brushable hair and 3 working orifices.

vanessa hudgens must be handicapped

By brendon May 28, 2010 @ 6:18 PM

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Vanessa Hudgens of course is that sexy bitch from those Disney movies, and yesterday she was caught parking in an alleged handicapped spot (they should mark these better).

I get mad when unattractive people do that, but in this case I agree with the hot teenager who is constantly taking and texting naked pictures of herself. I really admire the way she stands up to those god damed elderly. If you think about it, they need the exercise more than healthy people, so their spots should be as far away as possible. It’s part of Vanessas tough love program. She’s an amazing lady!

(source = fame pictures)

tuesday afternoon headlines

By brendon May 25, 2010 @ 6:27 PM

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‘PRINCE OF PERSIA’ - and ‘the Last Airbender’ are being accused of racism because their leads are played by white people. “Are these summer blockbusters racist?”, the Huff Post asks. “I sure do hope so,” I replied before feeling misled. (huff post)

MEGAN FOX - is not the first actress to accuse Michael Bay of being a prick. In fact I heard Claire Forlani had to sleep with him to get a role in ‘the Rock’. That’s just the rumor, and I’m not sure if it’s relevant, but I felt like the attention was shifting away from me for a second. (jezebel)

LINDSAY LOHAN - will still be able to take prescription meds like Ambien and Adderall even though she’s been ordered not to take drugs, and some say those meds are the root of her addiction problem. “You shut your whore mouth,” replied millions of people who take Ambien and Adderall. (tmz)

AVONS BREAST CANCER WALKS - start again this summer and people should go here and help Lauren. That’s what I did because I fucking hate breast cancer. I’ve loved big tits ever since I was like 3. There might as well be a disease that drowns Winnie the Poohs. (walk)

VANESSA HUDGENS - could be in a really hot incest porn with Thandie Newton. Someone look into setting that up.

vanessa hudgens knows how to dress

By brendon March 08, 2010 @ 11:38 AM

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Vanessa Hudgens wore one of her awesome backless dresses to the Vanity Fair party last night, and this one had a plunging neckline too. It showed twice the skin, making it twice as awesome. Her date Zac Efron (not pictured) could barely contain himself when he first saw it, and couldn’t wait to get her out of it. But eventually they agreed that Vanessa should be the one to wear it, and although disappointed, Zac understood that it wasn’t time yet.

(picture source = getty images)

i better not get noah wylie

By brendon January 22, 2010 @ 6:29 PM

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Speaking of Haiti and the telethon, the list of Hollywood stars who will be manning the phones is now out (highlights below, full list under the cut). What a sexy telethon this is gonna be.

Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston, Alec Baldwin, Gerard Butler, Sacha Baron Cohen, Bradley Cooper, Daniel Craig, Cindy Crawford, Penelope Cruz, Michael Clarke Duncan, Zac Efron, Colin Farrell, Mel Gibson, Selena Gomez, Neil Patrick Harris, Vanessa Hudgens, Dwayne Johnson, Daniel Day Lewis, Ewan McGregor, Toby Maguire, Jack Nicholson, Zoe Saldana (pictured), Adam Sandler, Nicole Scherzinger, Steven Spielberg, Charlize Theron, Sofia Vergara, Mark Wahlberg, Olivia Wilde, Reese Witherspoon

They should put up each celebrities number because I’m not giving shit to Billy Crystal. If anything I’d just call him a dick and hang up. That’s not gonna help Haiti. And Noah Wylie is probably just there to collect credit card numbers. I wasn’t born yesterday. I want Vanessa Hudgens, to see if she’d flash her bra to the camera for a thousand dollar donation. Look Vanessa, do you want to help these people or not?

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