By admin May 31, 2009 @ 6:31 PM
I guess I owe Andy Sambeg an apology. Bruno dropped his nuts in Eminens face and then Andy came on. Andys approach to improv appears to be this: Don’t. Don’t say anything. Just act like the moment that will be the stuff of award show legend for the next 20 years didn’t happen. Just pretend like you we’re looking at something else, over there, where nothing funny was happening.
Instead of getting Samberg to host this show, MTV should have gotten a homeless guy to blow his nose in his hand and then wipe it on my shirt. After that just scroll the winners names across the screen. There’s no way that could be any worse and it probably would have saved everyone a lot of money.
ZAC EFRON – is considering breaking up with Vanessa Hudgens because he’s being told, “When people see them together, they think of their characters.” As in from “High School Musical”. Another way to change his image would be to rant about how the Jews control the banks. They do, you know. I’ve got some stuff you should read. (source = star magazine)
LILY ALLEN – says that “Britain’s Got Talent” sensation Susan Boyle is overrated, and that 12-year-old Shaheen Jarfagholi should win (relevant videos over here). More importantly, how come we’re stuck with Paula Abdul and they get hot-ass Amanda Holden. Every time I see Amanda I wanna punch Paula. I’d rather “Idol” switch to footage from a truck stop toilet than go to Paula after every song. (source = daily mail)
SHAUNA SAND – for the second time today, the “star” of a set of pictures from Miami Beach has been overshadowed (this time by the random topless chick) but if you need to describe these Shauna pics to a coworker, stumble back and point at the monitor and say, “OHMY FUCKINGGOD WHATISTHAT?!” (source = mavrix and splash. jump to hq here)
By brendon April 22, 2009 @ 1:57 PM
Vanessa Hudgens wore a baggy mans shirt and seemingly nothing else at a nursery (plants not kids) in LA yesterday, and it’s probably safe to say that if photographs had closed-captioning, like from a narrator or something, it would just be 2 minutes of grunting sounds and the occasional, “yeah, yeah you're a naughty girl, aren't you?”
(image source = pacific coast)
By brendon April 15, 2009 @ 2:22 PM
Celebrity interviewing climbed to even greater heights this month when Self magazine (via the Sun UK) got Vanessa Hudgens to talk about her legs and feet for five minutes. Magazines are dying, huh? I wonder what the problem could be.
"I’ve got big calves that look good. When I wear heels, it looks like I’ve worked out my legs a lot, which is why I love them.
(But) I have a big, big, big toe. I call it my goat toe. I can climb anything.”
First of all, I’m looking right at her toe and I have no idea what she’s talking about. Second of all, if that was directed at me it totally didn’t work because she could have a toe with sentience and a talking face and I’d still pounce on that little slut and clamp down like I was holding on to the wing of a plane. It’s hard to forget those sexy and naked pictures she took and emailed to Zac Efron. Maybe because it was such a scandal, maybe because this is my desktop, there’s no way to know for sure, but this was a good enough reason to post pictures of her at last nights premier of “17 Birthdays” or something. The one where Matthew Perry has that Benjamin Button disease.
By brendon March 03, 2009 @ 4:34 AM
Vanessa Hudgens' hot little ass went to the US premiere of "Watchmen" last night at the Chinese in Hollywood, and she did it in the shortest skirt allowed by law. It might not even be street legal. She's so naughty. Her vagina could be all coarse like a lions tongue and I’d still pound away on it for days.
(picture source = splash news and getty images)
By brendon February 23, 2009 @ 2:22 AM
I’m trying to focus on Vanessa Hudgens because she’s such a hot little piece of ass, but there’s a lady behind her with huge juggs and it’s super distracting. The geriatric lust I’m feeling right now is new and confusing, but god almighty big tits are just the best. They’re my weakness. You might as well give a diabetic a bag of sugar.
(picture source = getty images)