Victoria Silvstedt Checks Her Thong for Change

By Lex March 10, 2014 @ 1:31 PM

Victoria Silvstedt In A Pink Bikini At Miami Beach
It’s day five of her commercial feeding frenzy in Miami and you wouldn’t believe the kind of gunk that’s built up in Victoria’s Silvstedt’s vagina. It’s similar to the miscellaneous refuse of a ’80 LeSabre ashtray. Lots of Wrigley’s wrappers and lint and loose buffalo nickels. But you can’t just run that pouch through the car wash. You need some kind of industrial solvents and a centrifuge to separate the coins from the secretions that are specifically designed to adhere currency. Not surprising, they got a lab for that in Miami.

Photo Credit: Splash, Pacific Coast News

Victoria Silvstedt Is Ready to Feed

By Lex March 07, 2014 @ 2:56 PM

Victoria Silvstedt In A White Bikini At The Beach In Miami
Looks like Victoria Silvstedt finally got her commercial vending license to legally trade on the beach in Miami. Victoria finds rich men on the beach like a senior with a metal detector finds lost crappy time pieces. She has one petite billionaire now, but those pussy-purchasing older hobbits tend not to last too long before jealous kid legal wrangling causes them to cut off your Diner’s Club card. Victoria’s tits fire off a resounding claxon blare as she approaches men in her net worth target range. It’s a really neat trick, especially around the holidays.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet, Pacific Coast News

Victoria Silvstedt In A Black Bikini At The Beach In St Barts

By Lex January 13, 2014 @ 1:24 PM

Victoria Silvstedt In A Black Bikini At The Beach In St Barts

Photo Credit:, FameFlynet, PCN

Whatcha Got Down There, Victoria Silvstedt?

By Travis January 07, 2014 @ 10:00 AM

As if there weren’t enough people on vacation in St. Barts this week, former Playboy Playmate and professional working girl Victoria Silvstedt is also there, reaching out to some new… friends. When she wasn’t making sure her vagina was still sparkling and rose-scented, Victoria was networking with some of St. Barts finest and wealthiest studs, undoubtedly so she can get them to invest in her latest business ventures and startup companies. And she also probably wanted them to have sex with her for money, because there’s a long-running rumor that she also does that, and while it would be unfortunate to interrupt a vacation with business, a girl’s got to eat.

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Victoria Silvstedt Bikinis With Her Yoda

By Lex January 02, 2014 @ 5:12 PM

Victoria Silvstedt With Friends In A Bikini In Saint Barthelemy
I checked. That’s not Victoria’s mom. I think it’s her titty model slash kept women sensei. A woman who has been looking good in bikinis for a decade or more past Victoria in order to keep herself rolling in clover. The pair met up again in St. Bart’s, it’s like Dagobah, but with more silicone on the beaches. Even a Level 7 trophy girlfriend like Victoria has more to digest from a woman whose body has been in the professional services industry since Victoria was just learning to give handies to the boys in school for ten krona. Like how to link your PayPal account directly to your vagina for universally accepted payments or training your cold sores to turn festive colors for the holidays around the world. The great ones never stop learning.

Photo Credit: PCN

Victoria Silvstedt Working in Miami

By Lex December 30, 2013 @ 3:50 PM

Victoria Silvstedt In An Orange Bikini At The Beach In Miami
I’m not sure exactly of the mechanics, but I know Victoria Silvstedt is required to register with the local police department when she arrives in the United States from her foreign ports of call. It goes back to a NATO Treaty of 1971 on sex workers. It might actually be related to that Interpol warning from Stockholm on the front end of DVDs. I’m no attorney, but if I were, I’d slip Victoria my card. What with all the vice arrests going on in Miami Beach over the holidays, she’s running a risky game.

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