Miley Cyrus Can’t Stop Flashing Her Cans

By Lex February 10, 2014 @ 3:06 PM

Miley Cyrus Topless On A Bed For March 2014 W Magazine
Here’s a little tip for photographers. If you want girls to get naked for your pictures, shoot in black and white. It’s instant artistic standing. I’ll be shooting monochrome to allow the light to capture your honest self. Now get your damn titties out and give me a distant smirk.

Once W magazine got Miley Cyrus to take her top off, a half-dozen models jumped onboard knowing you’re going to look fantastic following Miley. It’s like hitting the school talent show after the weird kid whose parents made him take flute lessons. You’re golden.

Photo Credit: W Magazine

Miley Cyrus Isn’t Disney, Holler, Y’All

By Lex February 04, 2014 @ 4:59 PM

Miley Cyrus Flashes Nipple In The March 2014 Issue Of W Magazine
In a tell all interview with Ronan Farrow, who himself is now famous for maybe being Frank Sinatra’s bastard son and blindly calling out Woody Allen for molesting his adopted sister, Miley Cyrus really let loose with her super shocking truth-ray. While she admits she doesn’t know much about what’s going on in the real world, Miley has a lot to say about the more important stuff, like what’s going on in her world. For instance, Miley says she’s proud to be a sexual revolutionary for young women everywhere:

I’m trying to tell girls, like, ‘Fuck that. You don’t have to wear makeup. You don’t have to have long blonde hair and big titties. I like that I’m associated with sexuality and the kind of punk-rock shit where we just don’t care.

Power to the well-worn clit. Punk rock has a long history of unattractive flat chested girls stuffing their vaginas full of sin and not giving a shit. You talk about equal rights for women, it has to start with the right to look like a preteen boy, get fucking wasted, and wake up next to an emotionally damaged stranger telling you to consider getting tested for the human papillomavirus. But the Mandela of pop music wasn’t done there. Miley further upped her rebel cred by giving a middle finger to anyone who would judge her antics:

I’m not Disney, where they have, like, an Asian girl, a black girl, and a white girl, to be politically correct, and, like, everyone has bright-colored T-shirts.

Excellent point. Except, you know, you are Disney. You built your entire rise to fame and stardom and being able to get high and pretend Ronan Farrow is a real journalist just from being a Disney titan. You were the white girl in the bright colored T-shirts. Miley did go on to say that everybody who criticizes her is just a jealous bitch, which even though she backed into the thought via Twitter teen logic, happens to be mostly true.

Photo Credit: W Magazine