pregnant(?) Jessica Simpson was a bridesmaid with Zach Braff

By brendon December 17, 2012 @ 2:40 PM

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Jessica Simpsons best friend is her former personal assistant CaCee Cobb, and Zach Braffs best friend is his former ‘Scrubs’ co-star Donald Faison, so of course Simpson and Braff were a bridesmaid and groomsman when Cobb and Faison got married this weekend in LA.

It’s worth noting that Jessica, who hasn’t officially confirmed that she’s pregnant again, looks pretty pregnant, even in blurry pictures and a black dress.

Also of note are the pictures of the evil witch who puts a curse on interracial relationships, the one that every dad in the south warns their daughters about.

(image source = inf)

Justin Timberlake sang to Jessica Biel at their wedding

By brendon October 22, 2012 @ 6:05 PM

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As you probably know by now, Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake got married on Friday at the Borgo Egnazia resort in southern Italy, and Justin Timberlake is a little douche. Us.com has updates on both.

At one point, the former boy bander served as his own wedding singer: “Justin performed one song at the wedding,” the source reveals. “It’s a new one that he hasn’t released yet. He dedicated it to Jessica.”

Oohh, how sexy. Her panties must have been drenched to have this castrato singing at her while looking into her eyes and reaching his hand out. It’s her wedding night, and her husband sounds like he’s been chemically sterilized. How romantic!

(image source of jessica in puglia, italy, today = inf)

Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake are getting married this week

By brendon October 17, 2012 @ 12:47 PM

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She still seems really cool, and he still seems like a little douche, but Jessica Biel is still gonna marry Justin Timberlake anyway, and now the hot rumor is that she’s gonna do it in the next few days in Italy.

“The wedding is top-secret,” a close friend of the couple tells Life & Style. “Save-the-dates went out in the spring and little information was given. Guests were warned that any phones or cameras would be confiscated, so best to leave them at the hotel.”
 In fact, the wedding’s so confidential, even loved ones had to sign confidentiality agreements and weren’t even informed of the venue!
“They were told just to fly to Italy,” shares an insider.

If I’m one of their closest friends or family, and I’m frisked at the door to make sure I don’t have my phone, this wedding better be in the fucking Batcave. “Come to this secret address, but don’t tell anyone where you’re going, and don’t bring your phone.” It sounds more like a lazy kidnapping than a wedding.

Anne Hathaway got married

By brendon October 01, 2012 @ 12:28 PM

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For months leading up to Kim Kardashians wedding, we heard every detail, and all her endorsement deals were right out in the open, but Anne Hathaway snuck off to Big Sur this weekend to marry Adam Shulman, her boyfriend for the past 4 years, and it was a total surprise.

She didn’t even auction off pictures of her dress to the highest bidder, she walked around right out in the open. I don’t see how she’s even gonna make a dime off this wedding. Personally, I think this sicko has some ulterior motive to getting married. I don’t what it is yet, but it’s all very suspicious.

(source = people. image source = fame/flynet)

Rosie O’Donnell got married

By brendon August 28, 2012 @ 2:11 PM

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Rosie O’Donnell, who is so fat that these pictures with her new wife look like forced-perspective shots set up to make her look enormous even though they’re actually standing side by side, got secretly married back in June! Congratulations!

Not only that, but her wife, Michelle Rounds, is way more attractive than I assumed she would be. They were originally supposed to get married in August, but O’Donnell had a heart attack and Rounds has desmoid tumors. Also O’Donnell had already eaten most of the wedding cake.

(source = la times. image source = fame/flynet)

Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake got married! Maybe!

By brendon August 20, 2012 @ 2:06 PM

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Jessica Biel was in Puerto Rico on Saturday, visiting Justin Timberlake who is there filming the idiotically titled ‘Runner, Runner’ with Ben Affleck, but Janet Charlton says they flew to Jackson Hole, Wyoming, that same day and secretly got married.

They pulled a fast one on everybody! They are in the middle of their ceremony at a very fancy private estate and members of the wedding party are staying at the Four Seasons Hotel there.

It is true that Biel went to the airport on Saturday (Splash has exclusive pictures), and a famous Hollywood cake designer was in Jackson Hole, so who knows, maybe this is true. Or maybe it’s not. I’m gonna post these old slutty pictures of Biel either way, because some of us take the high road Janet Charlton, we don’t trade in rumor and innuendo. This is how you get respect in this industry.