I don’t remember a whole lot from 1991, but I don’t think I ever liked the song ‘Summertime’. Well now Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff have done a new version, so maybe the problem before was that it didn’t have a man in his 40‘s with a hacking cough over a beat that sounds embarrassed to be there.
(listens to clip)
Oh hey so it turns that didn’t help at all and the song still sucks. The full version will be available for download on Monday, though I can’t imagine why you’d do that.
Will Smith was at the Moscow premiere of ‘Men in Black 3’ today when a male reporter tried to kiss him on the lips. That went over about as well as you might think and Smith backhanded him in the face (it looks worse in the second clip), then said, “He’s lucky I didn’t sucker punch him.” Which would have been terrific. Like when Heath Herring knocked out that Japanese guy, except prissier.
The LA Times says today that Sony has already spent close to $375 million to produce, market, and distribute ‘Men in Black 3′ (meaning it could end up being the most expensive movie ever made), and essentially has no chance of making any of that back. Especially since it will almost certainly suck because they began shooting before they even finished the script.
As Huff Post (via Vulture) reminds us, here’s how director Barry Sonnenfeld explained it…
“What happened is that we wanted this to be Will Smith’s next movie, and he was sniffing around at other movies at the time … So we had a script, with a really good first act and a fantastic ending, but there were scenes in the middle that needed work.”
“Oh, so just a few scenes in the middle, that’s no big deal,” said a straw man I made up just now to make a point. Because no, that’s not how it works. Movies (generally) have three parts. Act 1 establishes the characters and sets up the conflict. It’s the first 10 minutes or so. Act 3 is when the hero blows up the Death Star or wins the race or fucks the girl or whatever. It’s usually the last 5 minutes.
So what ‘Men in Black 3′ didn’t have was that hour and half in between Act 1 and Act 3 that is supposed to show a logical progression of events where Will Smith figures out how to save Tommy Lee Jones. Instead of that we’ll be treated to Smith shouting things that really don’t need to be shouted and him telling us how handsome he is.
Will Smith and Josh Brolin were in Madrid yesterday for the Spain premiere of ‘Men in Black III’, and not only did they have to go to the Madrid Tennis Open but they got paraded around like assholes to hit a giant tennis ball with a giant tennis racket.
Josh Brolin seems cool, so it’s no ok that they did this to him, but Will Smith seems like a dick so I bet the studio lives for these moments. “Ok’a Wheel Smith, now you’a putta on’a dis diaper and we’a bang’a you wife’a.”
That probably sounded more Italian but you get the idea.
It’s hard to believe this is same movie where Will Smiths insufferable ego made everyone miserable, and whose director admits that they started filming while the script was still being written, in fact they “didn’t have a finished second or third act”, which might have been “a really stupid idea.” To which special effects legend Rick Baker adds:
“We had a writer actually on the soundstage writing the words moments before the guys had to say them. I don’t think that’s any way to make a movie.”
Well there’s certainly no evidence of hastily written dialogue in the trailer. For example, when Will Smith is told that his partner has apparently been dead for 40 years, he yells “What?” And sure, every other character is an interchangeable straight man for Smith to overreact too, but movies are more fun when no one else talks except for one guy who goes around yelling.