VIDEO: CNN Reporters Feel Awful For Convicted Rapists

March 18, 2013 | video | editor| 0 Comments

If you’re unfamiliar with the case of two high school football players from Steubenville, Ohio who were recently accused of raping an unconscious 16-year old girl throughout an alcohol-fueled evening, you can get a pretty great idea of how awful this story is from yesterday’s Yahoo! report. For the short version, though, the two boys […]


Sofia Vergara Was Always Sexy (VIDEO)

March 15, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

I always read these stories about how older married couples rediscover long since forgotten romantic photos of themselves and it reminds them of their young love. Just kidding. I don’t read. I saw that in a Cialis ad during a hockey game. But this seems like the kind of shit old married couples do when […]


This Is What North Korea Thinks America Is Like

March 14, 2013 | video | editor| 0 Comments

Aside from the indentured servitude, mass starving and batshit crazy dictators, North Korea could probably be a pretty great place, but we’ll never know because those cranky, old white fellas running our country don’t want us hanging out over there. However, if Dennis Rodman says it’s a cool place, then it has to be cool, […]


Kick-Ass 2 Red Band Trailer (VIDEO)

March 14, 2013 | video | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I dug Kick-Ass. Unexpectedly good since (a) almost all comic book based movies disappoint, (b) it looked pretty shitty in early trailers, and (c) most childhood actors have shrill annoying voices, much like most children themselves. But I liked it. The sequel is coming out in August. The previous Kick-Ass 2 trailers have also looked […]


Shit You Can’t Do in a Basketball Game: Choke Your Teammate (VIDEO)

March 13, 2013 | video | editor| 0 Comments

File this under stuff you weren’t sure there was a rule for, but I guess it makes sense. Ronaldo Balkman formerly of the Knicks and Nuggets has found his way down to the Philippine Basketball Association. That right there ought to tell you something. That’s worse than being traded to Cleveland, though close. I guess Ronaldo had […]


Olivia Wilde Says She Wants To Be Wonder Woman

March 12, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Jason Sudeikis seems like an all right guy and he’d be fun to hang out with at a TGI Friday’s karaoke night in an Illinois suburb, but the fact that he landed Olivia Wilde is just mind-blowing. On top of being a decent actress and extremely good-looking, she may also be the most humble woman […]


Elizabeth Hasselbeck Fucks Up My Elizabeth Hasselbeck Tribute Video

March 12, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Any man who’s ever been sick or unemployed or just worked swing shift in an Eastern European circus knows that daytime television is bereft of anything worth stroking too. Unless you’re in the three percent of men busting it to children’s programming, or the nine percent of men organizing their junk closet to Anderson Cooper, […]


Snoop Dogg, Err, Snoop Lion, Tells Us Some Funny Shit (VIDEO)

March 11, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

I don’t have a strong desire to cozy up to celebrities. Most of them smell like Altoids and the quiet desperation of short people. But Snoop Dogg happens to be one of my idols. Where else but in America can a ugly mofo weed fiend make tens of millions of dollars, nail tons of hot […]


Justin Bieber Is No Stranger To Humiliating Pain

March 8, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

If Justin Bieber has taught us anything, it’s that grabbing your dick and moving your mouth while someone plays your album to an arena full of future Old Navy assistant managers is hard work. It’s even tougher when you spend your nights running around London with no shirt and your pants hanging low like a […]


Brittany Oldehoff Does Lingerie Up Proper (VIDEO)

March 8, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Tall hot girls from Florida always seem to end up marrying tawdry older real estate dudes who bang their secretaries when their wife is out at Pilates (men really are like that, the rumors are true). Project Runway model Brittany Oldehoff has a few years yet before her intergenerational marriage and inevitable messy divorce ensues, […]