I’m inclined to like all women named Joy. Joy is the kind of lady that gives you a pass on the little things and when you fuck up the big things, she tells you those don’t matter either. When Joy finds messages from other women on your phone, she tells you, we all make mistakes. Then she reminds you to never use the word pussy when sexting young Asian women, use tender spot instead. When you lose your job, Joy suggests maybe she should start live streaming herself on camera to help pay the rent. Maybe she’ll invite her hot friend also named Joy to join the show so she can earn enough to buy you that pool table. Joy knows Yards After Catch is the most underrated offensive stat in football and once punched Nancy Lopez in the face just because golf isn’t a real sport. When you need a hug, Joy just smiles and gives you a hummer because she knows you better than you know yourself. Joy was born without the ability to menstruate and would never negotiate with terrorists. Joy pees with the seat up and her top down, just so you’ll have something pleasant to watch while you pee alongside her. Joy is an orphan with no scheduled family parties for the rest of forever. Her only relative is a wealthy aunt who named Joy as sole heir to her fortune just prior to her trip to Oaxaca to protest the Mexican drug cartels. Joy believes that museums are just really boring silent movies and that dancing is for children. When Joy shits, a plate of perfectly cooked buffalo wings emerges from her anus. If she ever asks you mild, medium or hot, don’t be a cruel bastard and just ask for mild. When Joy frowns at you because you didn’t clean the garage like you promised, she can’t keep a straight face for long before she giggles and says, c’mon, you big lug, let’s go have lots of sex. I am inclined to like all women named Joy. You may choose to disagree. But then you shall never know Joy.
Photo Credit: Summerlove Swimwear