Beyonce Cancels Coachella

Musical genius Beyonce cancelled her performance at Coachella which would have left anyone with a decent head on their shoulders questioning what they paid for. She's apparently too pregnant to perform. read more

Walking Dead Shirt Deemed Racist

A Walking Dead T-shirt featuring the character Negan, played by Jeffrey Dean Morgan, has been pulled from shelves in Britain after some no doubt financially challenged guy complained about it. The shirt features the likeness of Negan, known for killing zombies with a... read more

Brittany Fultz Forcible Lap Dances And Shit Around The Web

Blond nursing home worker Brittany Fultz secretly recorded giving lap dances to 100-year old man, what's the tip on that? (Casey Anthony) read more

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Pedophiles in Obvious Places

If you've been saving a fake aghast expression, now's the time to deploy. It turns out grown men who work with girl gymnasts might be inappropriately touching the girls. If you're in a business where even if you're not a pedophile you're easily subject to allegations... read more

Bella Hadid and Stella Maxwell Kickoff Milan With Nipples

Fashion Weeks are like the Annual Fundraising Drives at your local elementary school, they take place five times a year and everybody pretends that's kosher. read more

Rihanna Is Your Humanitarian of the Year

Rihanna's Humanitarian of the Year Award from Harvard University surprised many people who didn't realize you could be a hard partying auto-tuned pop star and also be extremely charitable. read more

Jackie Evancho Wants Tranny Toilets Back

Under the former President the nation's schools were ordered to provide self-identified gender restroomfacilities. Nobody knew what that meant so they just told anybody with a dick not wearing a dressto piss in the bushes behind the portables. read more

Sinead O'Connor Pulling Back

Sinead O'Connor has had an interesting past couple of three years. Doubtful she remembers much of it. Facebook Memories will certainly help in that regard. read more

Courtney Stodden Aging Gracefully

Courtney Stodden is divorcing husband Doug Hutchison even though the two are continuing to live together since neither can independently afford rent in Los Angeles. Contrary to fairy tales, the pedophile you meet at fifteen never turns out to be your real soul mate. read more

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Jay Z Makes Songwriters Hall Of Fame

Do you actually know anyone who's been to a Hall of Fame of any kind? Sounds really fucking lame. You get a pass if you're in Cleveland because what else is there to do. Same with Cooperstown. read more

Sarah Dunsey Fake Sex Trafficking Stunt (VIDEO)

17 year old high school drop out Sarah Dunsey of Logan, Utah, went missing from the MGM Grand last month. A few days later her mother, an unemployed slightly overweight model named Amie Ellis posted a YouTube video along with her husband, begging for help. read more

Next Norwegian Up And Shit Around The Web

Frida Aasen is your next future Scandinavian swimsuit and lingerie model winner. It's a genetic lottery. Sorry, Serbia, back to the drawing board. read more